:)

Feeling better now.

Every day I try to remind myself and chat with God to build my faith in Him.
I can do nothing. He can.

every day I fight my reservations... remind myself to trust my gut feel. Maybe the better word to use isnt gut feel but the Holy Spirit in me.

I cant explain this..And not every christians much less a non christian, would believe me..but God does give us the ability to experience peace. And this peace is the evidence that somethings will or will not work out. Not to be mixed with doubt. or fear.

Anyway, just finished watching a cantonese drama... dang it..

I know ive always been a very serious or standoffish person to certain emotions...
Or just seemingly very calm..

But watching love stories, reading love stories etc...the side effect of it is that I sometimes ask myself why...

As for love songs..they're just really sappy..just saying..

But honestly... I wonder why my life isnt as romantic or dramatic.

And then I remember what I went through...lol! That in itself was a Bollywood movie! Short of running around the tree, I admit that I did enjoy being in the rain hahahahahaha

I wonder if my story was a canto drama, whether old flames will resurface hahaha That would be a proper canto drama... Oh and comedy needs to be had. :)

Dont get me wrong...I dont know if I still love him. what I do know is that I like any human, get lonely. And I like any human, will want to hold on to happy memories and have back those happy memories.
For all we know, while I may feel like the person has to be the same, it might not actually be so... hmm

Im not writing this with a serious longing hahaha Im just analysing.

Having seen a few of my friends gone through breakups, I realize just how valiable this experience that I had is to helping console them.

The many times that I tried so hard to find words to express my inner troubled feelings and sadness, have given me a vocabulary to describe what they sometimes can't...

Yes..okay Im not making sense...SIGH..

Anyway just felt like writing something... :)

Maybe God's peace of mind is giving me this objectivity hahaha

God Bless