My legs hurt and it doesnt help when they're also very wobbly... Had to find a chance to sit down on the train.
Thaks to yesterday's rarely done exercise...my abs hurt from 25 slow descending sit ups and 30mins brisk walk with slight steepness or 4% work level...and 30mins jogging on the treadmill...all that is causing me this pain. Im sure itws not much for gym regulars but for me...Im ust not planning to laugh much today...any laughter conjured could be equivilant to another dose of sit-ups...ouch
Im quite happy with my SUPER long blog entry yesterday but by the time that was done, I had a real bad headache too...seriously not funny man!!! one of those pains where its affecting ur eye too..and you keep wanting to tear? Yeh
Im fine now..except for the aches..but I forsee myself being in more pain tomorrow. Afterall, thats how it all is...the real pain comes on the 2nd day. :/
K gotta go. Work time!
God Bless
Monday, February 26, 2007
Sunday, February 25, 2007
Kids, God, Smoke, Run..all of the above...Wohoo.oh drat sunday is coming to an end..
What is it about children that make you stronger? Some kids deserve a spanking..some kids are so adorable that get the "you're so cute..pinch your cheeks" routine from every available adult... But most of the,, when they hold on to your hand..or maybe...3 fingers..or just the thumb..(depending on how big their hands are)..when they take hold of your hand..its an instant strength booster and you fell like you need to take care of that kid..no matter what happens to you. Especially those with "precious moments" eyes... :)
Kids are cute...when they are not yours hahahahah
Woke up super early today coz I had a discovery workshop in church to attend...got off the mrt at city hall and started walking to church but didnt feel like walking via the underpass...so I decided to walk outdoors for the 1st in a long time. As I took the escalator up, I spoke under my breathe.." God...I wud really love to hear your voice" This all spured from a conversation with a colleague the day before. I walked outside Cafe cartel and this old lady came up to me before i crossed the zebra crossing. Such a sweet looking old lady with the friendliest of voices, chinese...she asked me if I knew where New Creation Church was..I pointed it out to her and offered to bring her along , anyway I was going there too. As we walked, we spoke..given my minimal chinese proficiency..my chinese was amazingly fluent! She told me that she heard about this church only yesterday, from a pastor and decided to venture on her own (she's taiwanese on a holiday) to this church. She prayed to God and told him to lead her there. Whoever told her about this church, didnt tell her the address...sigh...but God is the best tour guide I know and she bumped into me.
She looked fragile..but she had a spirit in her that was strong and active and outspoken...:) So eay to talk to...
I told her that I rarely walk to church from the outdoors but today, something made me go that way. something that made me think, "why dont I walk outdoors for a change" Mind you I was late for meeting my frens for breakfast. I said, "Well now I knoe why He told me to walk outdoors." I didnt hear his voice...but he sure was there to guide me!
I apologized for the rough roads but she simply said, " its okay, where you go, I'll follow. Im fine" When we got to suntec, I had to hand her over to other people who were going for the chinese service. I gave her a hug that was well reciprocated...told her to take care and have fun and hope that we meet some day.
Barely 5 minutes and I felt like I had known her for ages...like she was my own relative..is that how God works? Is that favour He gives to his kids, that even normal ungodly people would feel a sense of warmth towards them and give them their hearts? Joseph was favoured by Potiphar and the King...
As I went through my day, she stuck in my mind and I doubt Id ever forget her..coz like kids..she made me feel stronger...she made me feel like I had to protect her. :/ Maybe Im finally starting to get a ahng of old people..aka..reborn kids. it is even cooler to be a reborn kid in God's arms.
I prayed for her safety in different parts of the day..I still do...even for my own grandparents...God Bless Them with godly strength and renewed youth..like 85 year old Caleb..I am as strong as I was..40 years ago...
I think all of this helped me in the discovery workshop...When the pastor talked about us being God's children..He is our father...I am his daughter...The small powerless (to Satan) child who grabs hold of God's hand as He brings me through life...If I run off to the corner, he comes running with me...no matter where..even in my troubled filled roads...some of these roads were of my own doing..some of them, Satan led me...
But..God still follows...to prevent me from falling..like how a dad would reach his arms to carry his child before she falls on her bum or steps into a puddle...Wheeeee!
Even in old age...He does the same thing..and we are as his little kid as we are...when we were 5 years old or what have you...Me grandma's face lights up when she sees us...like a ch8ild's face lights up at the sight of candy..or her favourite someone someone.
How loving is that..Ive got the image in my head but I cant seem to get a pic to fit that...its hard to fit that in without thinking that God's image wud be compromised..He is far more handsome than any man I wud dare to point out...Amen!
I went to SPGG after church to do abit of sports and came home with 2 sore, tired but satisfiably stretched legs.. :) A workout that made me workout my mind as well...Was thinking about Philip and Andrew, jesus's Disciples who didnt think of Jesus's capabilities when it came to feeding of 5000. Philip looked at the lack of resources to feed the crowd while Andrew looked at the magnitude of the problem. I looked at the lack of stamina and thelength of time & distance i had to complete...geez! But I know that i wudnt have gotten away fromt hat without a stitch or torn hamstring etc..if not for God hahaha :P 1 Hour!!! Cool shit man!
Lastly before I forget..the latest argument I had with my fren...ive been very strict with him...more often than not, its a natural reaction...I hate to tell him that mosts of what he suffers is from his own doing...but I do this not to insult him or put him down or nag...unfortunately.. the 1st word that describes this...1-sided conversation with him..is.....NAG. What to do...you got to do what you have to do...
After such a long time of biting my tongue..I told him that I felt like I was an optical cable trying to talk with a copper wire..the connection is that bad. He told me that he cant seem to quit his smoking..so he's trying to change his working env...somethingelse along the lines of."I cant seem to quit..Its difficult..etc" But I told him...that God is his father..stop depending on his own strength but God's. We both know this.. and much as my life isbnt very smooth sailing..I still try to look at things that way...Look to God like Simon Peter..instead of looking at the rustling waves below..or you'll start sinking... Allt he advice I gave...I knew he knew..and he knows that ive been trying not to say it for the longest time..hoping that he would find his way... I still hope he finds his way. While I say all this..I do realize the irony of my ways..that all thsi time, my ways of getting him to quit..short of threatening..is all my self efforts...I cud have simply gone to God.
Speaking of which..during my workshop. we had the usual ice-breakers and all of us intro-ed ourselves and our previous experience with God. Soo many oft hem were from other religions like Buddhism, Hindu..muslim...faiths Ive felt hindered me from talking to those who believed int hem..about God. Yet..God's ways prove the most effective and they have come fromt heir own accords..I thought of all my frens from diff religions and the many times I felt like telling them of God's love...ESP when they were in their worst times...If I cud tell them of God..maybe they would realize what they're missing!
If God can do that..why not get rid of my fren's smoking addiction? What can be stopping Him except that we pen the door to let Him in? He doesnt force us into anything we dont want to do...if He did, Men wouldnt be sinners...God would ahev locked that Tree Of Wisdom up so tight and put on a dozen cherubims or flying daggers etc..maybe eletric wired fence..bombs...ditches...angels allt he works...or mayeb just killed the both of them and remade humans! But like all parents..you let them off after abit of scolding and watch over them as they go aboutt heir lives...turnt heir heads tot he right direction when they're looking the wrong way...Oh Father...How do you love me....I cant even count the ways!
So bro, dont forget Jesus...you are not Philip or Andrew...Think like Simon Peter without looking down...You cant swim but who cares! You dont even have to!
Father..give him your wisdom..every time we meet, I see you by his side..coz obviously he gets himself into alot of trouble..but he seldom gets caught for it...no prizes on guessing who's helping him. Yet he's like a pampered kid..happy go lucky in such a dangerous way...though he knows the road is dark and dangerous, he still insisits on walking that road..I know you follow him Father...but somehow he doesnt see it..if he does..he's not showing it... he gets everyone worried and tired of his subconscious trouble making...even I as a sister cant take him...I cast my cares unto you Father..only you can bring him safely to light...praying for him is the best and surefire way...coz if any kid was aboutto step into a ditch...the father always sweeps him up before he takes his next step.
I will say the same for myself...your arms are conatsntly under me and I try to keep you in my sight and mind every time. not successful yet..but I will get there. About my past probs...I dont know how they still effect me until they come back to haunt me..but whatever it is, Father...I know you are right next to me when I face my demons...
I am filled with love now...thankfulness for the protection and love of God, the sacrifice of Jesus to make me God's child...and likewise when all I ask from God is granted...I ask that He would bless you all physically and spiritually, emotionally and psychologically..the works...and believe me when I say that I can see him casting his blessings on you right now, sending his angels to keep watch by your side... and best of all, watching you himself...when you accept him as your saviour..He automatically takes you as his child too.
God Bless
Kids are cute...when they are not yours hahahahah
Woke up super early today coz I had a discovery workshop in church to attend...got off the mrt at city hall and started walking to church but didnt feel like walking via the underpass...so I decided to walk outdoors for the 1st in a long time. As I took the escalator up, I spoke under my breathe.." God...I wud really love to hear your voice" This all spured from a conversation with a colleague the day before. I walked outside Cafe cartel and this old lady came up to me before i crossed the zebra crossing. Such a sweet looking old lady with the friendliest of voices, chinese...she asked me if I knew where New Creation Church was..I pointed it out to her and offered to bring her along , anyway I was going there too. As we walked, we spoke..given my minimal chinese proficiency..my chinese was amazingly fluent! She told me that she heard about this church only yesterday, from a pastor and decided to venture on her own (she's taiwanese on a holiday) to this church. She prayed to God and told him to lead her there. Whoever told her about this church, didnt tell her the address...sigh...but God is the best tour guide I know and she bumped into me.
She looked fragile..but she had a spirit in her that was strong and active and outspoken...:) So eay to talk to...
I told her that I rarely walk to church from the outdoors but today, something made me go that way. something that made me think, "why dont I walk outdoors for a change" Mind you I was late for meeting my frens for breakfast. I said, "Well now I knoe why He told me to walk outdoors." I didnt hear his voice...but he sure was there to guide me!
I apologized for the rough roads but she simply said, " its okay, where you go, I'll follow. Im fine" When we got to suntec, I had to hand her over to other people who were going for the chinese service. I gave her a hug that was well reciprocated...told her to take care and have fun and hope that we meet some day.
Barely 5 minutes and I felt like I had known her for ages...like she was my own relative..is that how God works? Is that favour He gives to his kids, that even normal ungodly people would feel a sense of warmth towards them and give them their hearts? Joseph was favoured by Potiphar and the King...
As I went through my day, she stuck in my mind and I doubt Id ever forget her..coz like kids..she made me feel stronger...she made me feel like I had to protect her. :/ Maybe Im finally starting to get a ahng of old people..aka..reborn kids. it is even cooler to be a reborn kid in God's arms.
I prayed for her safety in different parts of the day..I still do...even for my own grandparents...God Bless Them with godly strength and renewed youth..like 85 year old Caleb..I am as strong as I was..40 years ago...
I think all of this helped me in the discovery workshop...When the pastor talked about us being God's children..He is our father...I am his daughter...The small powerless (to Satan) child who grabs hold of God's hand as He brings me through life...If I run off to the corner, he comes running with me...no matter where..even in my troubled filled roads...some of these roads were of my own doing..some of them, Satan led me...
But..God still follows...to prevent me from falling..like how a dad would reach his arms to carry his child before she falls on her bum or steps into a puddle...Wheeeee!
Even in old age...He does the same thing..and we are as his little kid as we are...when we were 5 years old or what have you...Me grandma's face lights up when she sees us...like a ch8ild's face lights up at the sight of candy..or her favourite someone someone.
How loving is that..Ive got the image in my head but I cant seem to get a pic to fit that...its hard to fit that in without thinking that God's image wud be compromised..He is far more handsome than any man I wud dare to point out...Amen!
I went to SPGG after church to do abit of sports and came home with 2 sore, tired but satisfiably stretched legs.. :) A workout that made me workout my mind as well...Was thinking about Philip and Andrew, jesus's Disciples who didnt think of Jesus's capabilities when it came to feeding of 5000. Philip looked at the lack of resources to feed the crowd while Andrew looked at the magnitude of the problem. I looked at the lack of stamina and thelength of time & distance i had to complete...geez! But I know that i wudnt have gotten away fromt hat without a stitch or torn hamstring etc..if not for God hahaha :P 1 Hour!!! Cool shit man!
Lastly before I forget..the latest argument I had with my fren...ive been very strict with him...more often than not, its a natural reaction...I hate to tell him that mosts of what he suffers is from his own doing...but I do this not to insult him or put him down or nag...unfortunately.. the 1st word that describes this...1-sided conversation with him..is.....NAG. What to do...you got to do what you have to do...
After such a long time of biting my tongue..I told him that I felt like I was an optical cable trying to talk with a copper wire..the connection is that bad. He told me that he cant seem to quit his smoking..so he's trying to change his working env...somethingelse along the lines of."I cant seem to quit..Its difficult..etc" But I told him...that God is his father..stop depending on his own strength but God's. We both know this.. and much as my life isbnt very smooth sailing..I still try to look at things that way...Look to God like Simon Peter..instead of looking at the rustling waves below..or you'll start sinking... Allt he advice I gave...I knew he knew..and he knows that ive been trying not to say it for the longest time..hoping that he would find his way... I still hope he finds his way. While I say all this..I do realize the irony of my ways..that all thsi time, my ways of getting him to quit..short of threatening..is all my self efforts...I cud have simply gone to God.
Speaking of which..during my workshop. we had the usual ice-breakers and all of us intro-ed ourselves and our previous experience with God. Soo many oft hem were from other religions like Buddhism, Hindu..muslim...faiths Ive felt hindered me from talking to those who believed int hem..about God. Yet..God's ways prove the most effective and they have come fromt heir own accords..I thought of all my frens from diff religions and the many times I felt like telling them of God's love...ESP when they were in their worst times...If I cud tell them of God..maybe they would realize what they're missing!
If God can do that..why not get rid of my fren's smoking addiction? What can be stopping Him except that we pen the door to let Him in? He doesnt force us into anything we dont want to do...if He did, Men wouldnt be sinners...God would ahev locked that Tree Of Wisdom up so tight and put on a dozen cherubims or flying daggers etc..maybe eletric wired fence..bombs...ditches...angels allt he works...or mayeb just killed the both of them and remade humans! But like all parents..you let them off after abit of scolding and watch over them as they go aboutt heir lives...turnt heir heads tot he right direction when they're looking the wrong way...Oh Father...How do you love me....I cant even count the ways!
So bro, dont forget Jesus...you are not Philip or Andrew...Think like Simon Peter without looking down...You cant swim but who cares! You dont even have to!
Father..give him your wisdom..every time we meet, I see you by his side..coz obviously he gets himself into alot of trouble..but he seldom gets caught for it...no prizes on guessing who's helping him. Yet he's like a pampered kid..happy go lucky in such a dangerous way...though he knows the road is dark and dangerous, he still insisits on walking that road..I know you follow him Father...but somehow he doesnt see it..if he does..he's not showing it... he gets everyone worried and tired of his subconscious trouble making...even I as a sister cant take him...I cast my cares unto you Father..only you can bring him safely to light...praying for him is the best and surefire way...coz if any kid was aboutto step into a ditch...the father always sweeps him up before he takes his next step.
I will say the same for myself...your arms are conatsntly under me and I try to keep you in my sight and mind every time. not successful yet..but I will get there. About my past probs...I dont know how they still effect me until they come back to haunt me..but whatever it is, Father...I know you are right next to me when I face my demons...
I am filled with love now...thankfulness for the protection and love of God, the sacrifice of Jesus to make me God's child...and likewise when all I ask from God is granted...I ask that He would bless you all physically and spiritually, emotionally and psychologically..the works...and believe me when I say that I can see him casting his blessings on you right now, sending his angels to keep watch by your side... and best of all, watching you himself...when you accept him as your saviour..He automatically takes you as his child too.
God Bless
Friday, February 23, 2007
russian men! rosy cheeks and muscles...bye bye sister
I think Ive adopted the "i cant be bothered with my titles" attitude and written the 1st thing that comes to mind...
Had a WHOLE bunch of russian guys come over to my campus, all from a russian ship stopping over. Guess what, they're all 17-18! Geez! Rosy cheeks, muscles, bit tall and thin and some still have the boyish looks..as in 14 yr old boyish looks.
Pity I cudnt converse in russian lingo..sigh...
Met up w one of my sistas yesterday night and as we talked...I listened and looked at her and wondered at the length of time that we've been frens and how much she's matured..in dress sense and even in thinking.... she a confident woman now... so confident she can make u bleed by scoldng if she wanted to. Hahaha even though she still holds her soft toy and tries to irritate me with it..haiz..wat extermity of sides hahahah she's grown so much and man...hahahaha have we all just gone old...
Anyway...I cant wait to meet up with my old poly frens coz Ive got loads to tell them about...the change in poly life etc esp my club mates...
Meeting another few sistas later because one of them is leaving Spore for Aussie land tom afternoon. Gonna miss her..when Im with them, Im like a small kid again, being silly and lazy hahaahha yes I wud call that the definition of a kid hahahaha
K gotta go..dont let time flow through your fingers cause its precious :)
God bless!
Had a WHOLE bunch of russian guys come over to my campus, all from a russian ship stopping over. Guess what, they're all 17-18! Geez! Rosy cheeks, muscles, bit tall and thin and some still have the boyish looks..as in 14 yr old boyish looks.
Pity I cudnt converse in russian lingo..sigh...
Met up w one of my sistas yesterday night and as we talked...I listened and looked at her and wondered at the length of time that we've been frens and how much she's matured..in dress sense and even in thinking.... she a confident woman now... so confident she can make u bleed by scoldng if she wanted to. Hahaha even though she still holds her soft toy and tries to irritate me with it..haiz..wat extermity of sides hahahah she's grown so much and man...hahahaha have we all just gone old...
Anyway...I cant wait to meet up with my old poly frens coz Ive got loads to tell them about...the change in poly life etc esp my club mates...
Meeting another few sistas later because one of them is leaving Spore for Aussie land tom afternoon. Gonna miss her..when Im with them, Im like a small kid again, being silly and lazy hahaahha yes I wud call that the definition of a kid hahahaha
K gotta go..dont let time flow through your fingers cause its precious :)
God bless!
Thursday, February 22, 2007
why?
why am i blogging agin? dunno leh..
This is one of those times where I dont feel like doing anything and yet my fingers are itchy...type type type type type type...
my table's a mess. just got some stuff settled today and am abit happy hahaha well that shudnt be the case right? someone who's a chrsitian only needs to look to God to be happy and know that eveyrthing will be settled by him..then why am I still so troubled? Coz? Coz i lack the faith to even start looking to God?
Anyway...feel like taking a day off from work yet... I cant coz I'll feel guilty..what teh hell is that about man!
I know my life is in a mess coz Ive put too many thigsn on hold that my life is basically put on hold except work. Work can be cool and fun I admit and its really all thsnk to student naughty and nice...:/
Soo I guess you should stop reading...coz Im just going all jibberish hahahahaha
anyway Ive satisfied my appetite for jibberishy fingers and mindless thoughts
God BLess
This is one of those times where I dont feel like doing anything and yet my fingers are itchy...type type type type type type...
my table's a mess. just got some stuff settled today and am abit happy hahaha well that shudnt be the case right? someone who's a chrsitian only needs to look to God to be happy and know that eveyrthing will be settled by him..then why am I still so troubled? Coz? Coz i lack the faith to even start looking to God?
Anyway...feel like taking a day off from work yet... I cant coz I'll feel guilty..what teh hell is that about man!
I know my life is in a mess coz Ive put too many thigsn on hold that my life is basically put on hold except work. Work can be cool and fun I admit and its really all thsnk to student naughty and nice...:/
Soo I guess you should stop reading...coz Im just going all jibberish hahahahaha
anyway Ive satisfied my appetite for jibberishy fingers and mindless thoughts
God BLess
Men!
..sigh...just a month ago, my junior and I were talking abt comperes and we came across the universal theory. The ones who are the most confident...are the ones who hav the most serious inferiority complex...
Well confessions confessions...if the whole world knew how scared I am of men....Im fine with guys or boys...just not cool about "men" Hahahahah go figure that out. maybe its something in my past that Ive forgotten... thats prob why my inner alarm goes off when they come near...
whatever it is..its often got me stumpped....
thats why much as I want to learn how to cycle or swim...id rather a girl taught me.....in what case..anything requiring physical contact with a guy/boy/man...is a NO...unless Im truly close w the person...whats strange is...different people make me feel different levels of comfort. no pune intended... some I can handle, some...I cant...some are just repelling...haiz..whats wrong with me ah...
anyway..as i walked home from work yesterday, something in me figured out something about myself...the reason why i dont like chinese guys...is coz they look dead..hahahhaha well most of them...theres nothing in their eyes... or maybe they have too small eyes that you cant damn well see a thing?!?! Hahaha I guess thats why I prefer non-chinese...coz they have bigger eyes and more beautiful eyes...esp teh shades of blue and green ones hahahha :)
Thats also wy I love armir khan hahaha and vijay :P
so its not so much the indian race that I like....
k anyway..enough chat!
God Bless!
Well confessions confessions...if the whole world knew how scared I am of men....Im fine with guys or boys...just not cool about "men" Hahahahah go figure that out. maybe its something in my past that Ive forgotten... thats prob why my inner alarm goes off when they come near...
whatever it is..its often got me stumpped....
thats why much as I want to learn how to cycle or swim...id rather a girl taught me.....in what case..anything requiring physical contact with a guy/boy/man...is a NO...unless Im truly close w the person...whats strange is...different people make me feel different levels of comfort. no pune intended... some I can handle, some...I cant...some are just repelling...haiz..whats wrong with me ah...
anyway..as i walked home from work yesterday, something in me figured out something about myself...the reason why i dont like chinese guys...is coz they look dead..hahahhaha well most of them...theres nothing in their eyes... or maybe they have too small eyes that you cant damn well see a thing?!?! Hahaha I guess thats why I prefer non-chinese...coz they have bigger eyes and more beautiful eyes...esp teh shades of blue and green ones hahahha :)
Thats also wy I love armir khan hahaha and vijay :P
so its not so much the indian race that I like....
k anyway..enough chat!
God Bless!
Sunday, February 18, 2007
Sebana Cove
At Sebana Cove now..yes that wud be johor...on my auntie's ship with my whole family.
This chinese new year is the pig year so 3 oinks for every piggy baby. Dont know how to describe how I feel coz Ive got loads on my mind...some good some not so good..some normal...
My 2 cousins went jetskiing and got caught in the low tides. took the crew abt 1 hour to save them? Yep...not a joke at all...even when I was laughing till I teared.
Hmmm one thing I have to say...until my cousin has her child..there are no small kids in our family and it really hit me to see my youngest cousin grown up sooo quickly. He's now a young man. Once again, the protective feeling came over me and once again I thought, "if any girl hurts my cousin...Id smack her" hahahaha
cal me crazy and insane and siao hahahhahaas long as my family is okay...
I tried jetskiing too and its really quite fun..but I guess..till I learn how to swim..I better not try to hard on jetskiiing hahahhaha almost fell off from my cousin's jetski hahahaha "wat the!"
gonna end here... :/
God Bless!
This chinese new year is the pig year so 3 oinks for every piggy baby. Dont know how to describe how I feel coz Ive got loads on my mind...some good some not so good..some normal...
My 2 cousins went jetskiing and got caught in the low tides. took the crew abt 1 hour to save them? Yep...not a joke at all...even when I was laughing till I teared.
Hmmm one thing I have to say...until my cousin has her child..there are no small kids in our family and it really hit me to see my youngest cousin grown up sooo quickly. He's now a young man. Once again, the protective feeling came over me and once again I thought, "if any girl hurts my cousin...Id smack her" hahahaha
cal me crazy and insane and siao hahahhahaas long as my family is okay...
I tried jetskiing too and its really quite fun..but I guess..till I learn how to swim..I better not try to hard on jetskiiing hahahhaha almost fell off from my cousin's jetski hahahaha "wat the!"
gonna end here... :/
God Bless!
Friday, February 16, 2007
Comperes! Church! Work! Oh Jesus Thank you!
Comperes is shaping up! Yeah! Wohooo! Calista beat them up to shape! I think they can succeed. Saw my old scripts just now and I smiled to myself! Those were the good old days. My heartbeat started pumping faster even while reading them. adrenaline!
Church lessons for the next fw sundays..sorry girls..cant meet up with you guys in the morning...
cant wait for my church thing though...something in me...
Work is good....Im trying to be my controlled self and get as much work done as possible...Father help me to be a good employee...
I miss compereing.....I really really miss compereing.....
God Bless
Church lessons for the next fw sundays..sorry girls..cant meet up with you guys in the morning...
cant wait for my church thing though...something in me...
Work is good....Im trying to be my controlled self and get as much work done as possible...Father help me to be a good employee...
I miss compereing.....I really really miss compereing.....
God Bless
Thursday, February 15, 2007
bad dreams....
last week, I dreamt that I had a bad organ disease..something deadly...
last night, I dreamt that there was a religious enslaughtering....this time..relentless
Had a talk with one of my colleagues yesterday adn wat she said got me thinking alot...now I really know..something is wrong with me.
To her and to another colleague of mine..I seem haggard, tired, "shrunk" HE said I was tall when he first knew me..but since working, Ive shrunk...
I cant help but admit that that is true in some sense...another change in me is that...Im losing control of my mind again..not that I had control of it int he 1st place..but I think Ive become sooo sensitive to what others think..esp higher power...that Im a pinball going back and forth...
Truly...what is wrong with me? Why did I get like that and how do I get out? You know at this point..Im contemplating visiting a therapist hahhahah
Do I really know what Im doing? If I keep having this...what kind fo job suits me? Haiz...
God Bless
last night, I dreamt that there was a religious enslaughtering....this time..relentless
Had a talk with one of my colleagues yesterday adn wat she said got me thinking alot...now I really know..something is wrong with me.
To her and to another colleague of mine..I seem haggard, tired, "shrunk" HE said I was tall when he first knew me..but since working, Ive shrunk...
I cant help but admit that that is true in some sense...another change in me is that...Im losing control of my mind again..not that I had control of it int he 1st place..but I think Ive become sooo sensitive to what others think..esp higher power...that Im a pinball going back and forth...
Truly...what is wrong with me? Why did I get like that and how do I get out? You know at this point..Im contemplating visiting a therapist hahhahah
Do I really know what Im doing? If I keep having this...what kind fo job suits me? Haiz...
God Bless
Wednesday, February 14, 2007
Valentines Day
I bet you a dozen dozens of people are blogging abt V day now hahahah Im just one of them.
The fact that Im blogging abt it now..is coz I dont have much plans for V Day...if I did, Id much rather spend my time outside hahahah but nvm abt that. Im fine like this as it is hahahahha
Before i forget, Happy V Day to everyone..attached or single. It is also friendship day as well mind you so just coz 2 girls go out together..doesnt mean their lesbian. I also personally know people who go out today for the fun of making fun of couples hahahahh however you choose to live your day....whatever makes you happy.
Supposed to be a rollerbalding day today but seeing as both my rollerblading partners are not int he office..I guess its cancelled...so if I have yet decided to continue with my blading plans...
Today's after work plans is to stay at moberly and do my work...Hahahaha
Anyway...got a request to sing at a function...want to do it but....scared hahahaha
My sister was being a small sister yesterday...heaven knows when she started bringing her new stuffed toy around and playing it like she used to do with barbie..yesterday she decided to do that while I was trying to read. She made the thing look at my book (blocking my view) and look at me and at the book...and scratch its head..etc... In what case..I cant help but call my sister crazy..yet be touched by the whole ridiculous gesture to irritate me with the (i confess) cute thing. Which I also took pics of hahaha The toy was shocked to have his photo taken..and I somehow sense abit of pride and "ya ya"ness hahahahaha Silly sister! May she never grow old, always stay midgetty (coz it makes her perfectly compact) and stay "Wei Tshen"ish as possible. Truth is..I cant define her in a sentence or 2syllable word.....hahahahha
K I end here....Happy V Day!
God Bless!
The fact that Im blogging abt it now..is coz I dont have much plans for V Day...if I did, Id much rather spend my time outside hahahah but nvm abt that. Im fine like this as it is hahahahha
Before i forget, Happy V Day to everyone..attached or single. It is also friendship day as well mind you so just coz 2 girls go out together..doesnt mean their lesbian. I also personally know people who go out today for the fun of making fun of couples hahahahh however you choose to live your day....whatever makes you happy.
Supposed to be a rollerbalding day today but seeing as both my rollerblading partners are not int he office..I guess its cancelled...so if I have yet decided to continue with my blading plans...
Today's after work plans is to stay at moberly and do my work...Hahahaha
Anyway...got a request to sing at a function...want to do it but....scared hahahaha
My sister was being a small sister yesterday...heaven knows when she started bringing her new stuffed toy around and playing it like she used to do with barbie..yesterday she decided to do that while I was trying to read. She made the thing look at my book (blocking my view) and look at me and at the book...and scratch its head..etc... In what case..I cant help but call my sister crazy..yet be touched by the whole ridiculous gesture to irritate me with the (i confess) cute thing. Which I also took pics of hahaha The toy was shocked to have his photo taken..and I somehow sense abit of pride and "ya ya"ness hahahahaha Silly sister! May she never grow old, always stay midgetty (coz it makes her perfectly compact) and stay "Wei Tshen"ish as possible. Truth is..I cant define her in a sentence or 2syllable word.....hahahahha
K I end here....Happy V Day!
God Bless!
Monday, February 12, 2007
...
Spent last sat at sch, taking pics of my students and their bike...then had a meeting to settle some club stuff. My aim is to make them independent and motivated and not to lose touch with them...not to mention maintain if not improve their standard...
Spent yesterday at my fren's mum's funeral.
Despite the curiousity to see how taoist funerals are done...I didnt agree with it. Before I continue...please excuse me if I offend your religion. Please take this w a pinch of salt...
I cant believe the idea that the taoist monk brings everyone on a walk around the place for a few rounds...to lead the dead to the other world. or that the monk brings a lantern and waves it in the air for the dead to follow...
the other stuff like the face towel, string and wrapped up coin..etc...hmmm sceptic..
Anyway Ive decided that if and when I die, Just cremate me and scatter my ashes somewhere overseas..if you dont get caught in customs 1st. Anyway if you cant scatter me overseas..then spore river then...whatever it is..dun stick me in a shelf and dont bury me...
During the wake..if there is one...dont get the funeral band to play for me..get a proper band and play songs Ive always liked..a good singer would be good too..make it a concert... :) No burning of paper money and taoist monks and lanterns etc coz I wont be following..Id be in heaven already.
Dont have to march along the street for me coz its pointless... dont burn paper houses or cars etc as well coz I cant drive and I wont get it...
Just have a family and frens gathering, take out photo albums and think of the happy times and I'll try my best to be there with you guys... :) If God allows me to :P
Plus....dont leave my belongings in the house..throw it away..but distribute what you can (not clothes, not shoes, etc) to those I love and who need it.
ALSO...before you cremate me...if my body is not too old, give my organs or whatever away 1st... to help others
It may seem very solemn and crazy but I guess thats how i want it to be. I know my place is in heaven and Im happy..I might even forget everything in the world...who knows! But Im happy enough knowing that if anything happens you guys still have memories of me.
Dont cry so much coz Im happy! Cry for awhile because you miss me but other than that, be happy because I live in photo albums and hearts and heaven :P
Before any of that happens...always remember to apprecaite everyone we love. I love you guys :) I believe that God loves me and that All of God's children are under his special care so I wouldnt be dying too soon Hahahaha
LOVE you!
God Bless!
Spent yesterday at my fren's mum's funeral.
Despite the curiousity to see how taoist funerals are done...I didnt agree with it. Before I continue...please excuse me if I offend your religion. Please take this w a pinch of salt...
I cant believe the idea that the taoist monk brings everyone on a walk around the place for a few rounds...to lead the dead to the other world. or that the monk brings a lantern and waves it in the air for the dead to follow...
the other stuff like the face towel, string and wrapped up coin..etc...hmmm sceptic..
Anyway Ive decided that if and when I die, Just cremate me and scatter my ashes somewhere overseas..if you dont get caught in customs 1st. Anyway if you cant scatter me overseas..then spore river then...whatever it is..dun stick me in a shelf and dont bury me...
During the wake..if there is one...dont get the funeral band to play for me..get a proper band and play songs Ive always liked..a good singer would be good too..make it a concert... :) No burning of paper money and taoist monks and lanterns etc coz I wont be following..Id be in heaven already.
Dont have to march along the street for me coz its pointless... dont burn paper houses or cars etc as well coz I cant drive and I wont get it...
Just have a family and frens gathering, take out photo albums and think of the happy times and I'll try my best to be there with you guys... :) If God allows me to :P
Plus....dont leave my belongings in the house..throw it away..but distribute what you can (not clothes, not shoes, etc) to those I love and who need it.
ALSO...before you cremate me...if my body is not too old, give my organs or whatever away 1st... to help others
It may seem very solemn and crazy but I guess thats how i want it to be. I know my place is in heaven and Im happy..I might even forget everything in the world...who knows! But Im happy enough knowing that if anything happens you guys still have memories of me.
Dont cry so much coz Im happy! Cry for awhile because you miss me but other than that, be happy because I live in photo albums and hearts and heaven :P
Before any of that happens...always remember to apprecaite everyone we love. I love you guys :) I believe that God loves me and that All of God's children are under his special care so I wouldnt be dying too soon Hahahaha
LOVE you!
God Bless!
Saturday, February 10, 2007
Ohh my left leg hurts
this sun is my fren's mum's procession to the crematorium....I know that that is the worst time for her and she will break down and she did say that she really wanted me to go so I guess I'll be going for the later church service.
Yesterday night, met up with my compere juniors...and tried my best to make frens with all of them..even those that are 7 years my junior...geez! I know my loyalty is split between comperes and isc...and if I had a choice...I wud want to be the officer for comperes as well....coz they are like my siblings! For the 1st time, the seniors and juniors talked out eveyrthing and they've got a renewed devotion to comperes..the magic is coming back!!!! Wohooo! Its also been a long time since I met up with some of my frens, cal, saad..etc wish more of them came but wat can we do? we cant force them.....
My left foot is aching now coz I went bowling during yesterdays lunch and I did abit of blading during the comperes gathering :P Cant wait for CNY to come coz Im going on a boat :P but also coz Ive got a bunch of ISC peeps to go to chinatown with hahaha
K gotta stop here. work to do. BYEz!
Yesterday night, met up with my compere juniors...and tried my best to make frens with all of them..even those that are 7 years my junior...geez! I know my loyalty is split between comperes and isc...and if I had a choice...I wud want to be the officer for comperes as well....coz they are like my siblings! For the 1st time, the seniors and juniors talked out eveyrthing and they've got a renewed devotion to comperes..the magic is coming back!!!! Wohooo! Its also been a long time since I met up with some of my frens, cal, saad..etc wish more of them came but wat can we do? we cant force them.....
My left foot is aching now coz I went bowling during yesterdays lunch and I did abit of blading during the comperes gathering :P Cant wait for CNY to come coz Im going on a boat :P but also coz Ive got a bunch of ISC peeps to go to chinatown with hahaha
K gotta stop here. work to do. BYEz!
Monday, February 05, 2007
Bless God for Speedy Connections!
Hahhaha I had to fight Satan for this connection man! Am at Mac D's now and just stopped to blog Hehehe
Okay well nothing much these days..only that the weekends seem to fly extra fast. Friday...POOF...Monday! Damn!
Got a compere get together this fri and Im soo excited! I never stopped believeing that Comperes ROCKS! We are the Show Gods! Hahah as my ex president would say. I sooo want all the compere alumni I know to go man and Im soo glad I kept in contact with some of them. Even the ones 4-5 years ago lah! Thanks God! Im raising a red alarm for comperes because I personally feelt hat their standard is dropping and it shudnt drop! If we drop in standard, whoelse is gonna steal the show?!?!? Hahahahaha I appeal to all comperes that read my blog..must be very few...to come this fri. East Coast BBQ man! If you're not sure, call me or email me. h.w.ning@gmail.com
Anyway... had ice cream lunch today wahahah hence he high seratonin even now haah but Im dead hungry now and I refuse to eat mac donalds! Sheessshhh dont let them know k. Id rather go home to eat noodles!
One of my sisters is having trouble these days and its a challenge to counsel her and even others when they dont believe in the God I know. Alot of them think that it takes alot of effort to be saved..to got o heaven....I beg to differ. I wish I cud show them how much God loves them! Heard the sermon last sunday talk abt how God makes us as the symbol and source of blessings and I truly hope to be such a person to show people that God is soo good...even when they dont know Him...esp when they are troubled. I wish I cud be a source of comfort and blessings... :) That even the stupid things I do..bring joy and laughter to them..yes even if I was a clown. Clowns have a way of seeing life so that they dont take it too seriously... My dear dear sister..I wud pray that God would in some way tweek your brain to read this and know that however somethings seemt o be..it is never the whole truth...fact is not truth...Fact can be relative but truth can not. Fact can be a true statement but it might not be the whole truth. Fact is life is rocky in some parts of your life...truth is God loves you and conquers all for you and brings you over troubled water even and especially at ur troubled times..open your eyes to see that you're stronger than how you think you are..not coz of your strength..but coz of Jesus...
No begging is needed..no constant repentive behaviour is needed coz Everything you have to go through is taken by Jesus, to the cross.
K gotta go off now.. home it it...made a promise to my sister that I wud be back home earlier..at least before 11pm and I intend to keep it. Why? Coz she is my sis...dont ask me to explain the bond I have with her...she herself has a charisma that is "bo chap" but caring...how strange..how odd...how..thats my sister! Hahahahah I love her loads and no matter how she can complain that I call everyone but her "sister", its not always wats called that matters...but how its treated..is that not so?
God Bless!
Okay well nothing much these days..only that the weekends seem to fly extra fast. Friday...POOF...Monday! Damn!
Got a compere get together this fri and Im soo excited! I never stopped believeing that Comperes ROCKS! We are the Show Gods! Hahah as my ex president would say. I sooo want all the compere alumni I know to go man and Im soo glad I kept in contact with some of them. Even the ones 4-5 years ago lah! Thanks God! Im raising a red alarm for comperes because I personally feelt hat their standard is dropping and it shudnt drop! If we drop in standard, whoelse is gonna steal the show?!?!? Hahahahaha I appeal to all comperes that read my blog..must be very few...to come this fri. East Coast BBQ man! If you're not sure, call me or email me. h.w.ning@gmail.com
Anyway... had ice cream lunch today wahahah hence he high seratonin even now haah but Im dead hungry now and I refuse to eat mac donalds! Sheessshhh dont let them know k. Id rather go home to eat noodles!
One of my sisters is having trouble these days and its a challenge to counsel her and even others when they dont believe in the God I know. Alot of them think that it takes alot of effort to be saved..to got o heaven....I beg to differ. I wish I cud show them how much God loves them! Heard the sermon last sunday talk abt how God makes us as the symbol and source of blessings and I truly hope to be such a person to show people that God is soo good...even when they dont know Him...esp when they are troubled. I wish I cud be a source of comfort and blessings... :) That even the stupid things I do..bring joy and laughter to them..yes even if I was a clown. Clowns have a way of seeing life so that they dont take it too seriously... My dear dear sister..I wud pray that God would in some way tweek your brain to read this and know that however somethings seemt o be..it is never the whole truth...fact is not truth...Fact can be relative but truth can not. Fact can be a true statement but it might not be the whole truth. Fact is life is rocky in some parts of your life...truth is God loves you and conquers all for you and brings you over troubled water even and especially at ur troubled times..open your eyes to see that you're stronger than how you think you are..not coz of your strength..but coz of Jesus...
No begging is needed..no constant repentive behaviour is needed coz Everything you have to go through is taken by Jesus, to the cross.
K gotta go off now.. home it it...made a promise to my sister that I wud be back home earlier..at least before 11pm and I intend to keep it. Why? Coz she is my sis...dont ask me to explain the bond I have with her...she herself has a charisma that is "bo chap" but caring...how strange..how odd...how..thats my sister! Hahahahah I love her loads and no matter how she can complain that I call everyone but her "sister", its not always wats called that matters...but how its treated..is that not so?
God Bless!
Sunday, February 04, 2007
Love is a mnay splendid thing but its close to impossible to obtain
Was made the informal mediator for my 2 frens whom were fighting and on the brink of ending a relationship. The 2 of them adore each other...the kind of feeling that comes from the fits of our hearts and feels like a bottomless pit. The kind of feeling that will in turn make you cry till you body is drained of water if you lose the person...As I mediated, I asked God for guidance...at the same time, I asked God why....
Why Abba? Why does Satan torment them? Why is it no matter how much they love each other... the love doesnt solve their problem? Doesnt love make the world go round?
All these ernest and seemingly idealistic questions came from my heart...Yes Ive gone through relationship shit before and Ive asked Him this before and much as I know the reason why... its hard to accept... Love does indeed make the world go round...dont limit yourself to just relationship BGR love..but all other sorts of love. It does make the world go round...I believe it even now.
Today, she smsed all her frens that she was sorry if she ever mistreated them etc....vaguelly like a pre-suicidal note and I called her and called her and called her....a young girl like her doesnt need to feel this shitty but a young girl like her doesnt need to die so young...all trials are TEMPORAL. It is soo hard to explain to a non-believer that God loves us...that we as christians dont need to lift a finger to experieince God's love because Jesus gave up his life for that. How do I explain to them? Abba...teach me. Also..please stop her from doing something stupid...
On Fri, I had a long talk w one of my ISC students...we talked about everything and in certain areas...the resemblence is uncanny! It haunts me that the both of us could be soo similar even when we're a sea apart! :P
Another discovery I made was that the only multiracial thing we have here..is the multilingual swearing hahahha
Anyway watching the videof or the current indian song I like now...its damn hunting lah FREAK SHIT!
God Bless
Why Abba? Why does Satan torment them? Why is it no matter how much they love each other... the love doesnt solve their problem? Doesnt love make the world go round?
All these ernest and seemingly idealistic questions came from my heart...Yes Ive gone through relationship shit before and Ive asked Him this before and much as I know the reason why... its hard to accept... Love does indeed make the world go round...dont limit yourself to just relationship BGR love..but all other sorts of love. It does make the world go round...I believe it even now.
Today, she smsed all her frens that she was sorry if she ever mistreated them etc....vaguelly like a pre-suicidal note and I called her and called her and called her....a young girl like her doesnt need to feel this shitty but a young girl like her doesnt need to die so young...all trials are TEMPORAL. It is soo hard to explain to a non-believer that God loves us...that we as christians dont need to lift a finger to experieince God's love because Jesus gave up his life for that. How do I explain to them? Abba...teach me. Also..please stop her from doing something stupid...
On Fri, I had a long talk w one of my ISC students...we talked about everything and in certain areas...the resemblence is uncanny! It haunts me that the both of us could be soo similar even when we're a sea apart! :P
Another discovery I made was that the only multiracial thing we have here..is the multilingual swearing hahahha
Anyway watching the videof or the current indian song I like now...its damn hunting lah FREAK SHIT!
God Bless
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