We all know I used to be a compere when I was in SP and so I do want to build Comperes up again to where it was...but its taking me more than I thought needed to get them back up.
But we made good progress in my opinion during the comperes camp. i see improvement but I also see a very fragile situation.
1 of my comperes quit today. Not something Im proud of...too many of my students have backed off. I cant say its totally my fault but I cant say its not my fault at all. I wish I cud have done things differently. but I also know that if I did things differently...I might not be able to get to where I need to be and I also know that even if I changed the way i did it, it wouldnt have made things better if the person doesnt change too. In fact it might get worse. Sigh
But as I saw the juniors practice..I see improvement...I see committement but I also see unsureness, lack of confidence and in some..a lack of committement.
In the night, I got a chance to speak to them. I got to bond with them and that is precious to me. I want them to be able to speak openly. God knows I care of them and love them.
But ive said it to all of them...This is as far as Im gonna go to train them. Thats all I'll give tillt eh juniors come in and after that they will be on their own....
I know I shouldnt be worried and shouldnt be stressing on them. I know I should cast them into God's hands and see them prosper. See them change under God's care.
Lord, I cast the club into your care. Everything I cast into your care will be raised to glorify you because I woud not be able to boast of my efforts to raise the club. It will all be from you.
Thank you Father.
Sunday, March 29, 2009
Wednesday, March 25, 2009
We walked with God and invited Him for dinner
Let me start off with the chat I had with 1 of my students the night before.
It wasnt planned. alike most of my dinners w my students that are spur of the moment things.
I walked by the club house hungry but too late to go home and declare that i havnt eaten..hence I "jio"ed whoever was in the clubhouse who didnt mind eating w their "fierce" officer..for dinner.
Turns out only 1. A young ever-cheerful china christian boy.
Dont get your mind into crazy thoughts yah. Everything is as it is and no funny ideas.
The 2 of us walked to the mrt station enthusiastically for the sole purpose of getting to somewhere to appease our angry stomachs.
In my hands as I walked..were some stuff I printed out abt various well known pastors. All strong faithed pastors who have moved the world and yet suffer the criticism and condemnation by fellow pastors and non-christians. (tell you that in another session. Havnt finished reading them) So when he saw what I was reading, we started on the topic of God.
Bear in mind that Im so bad a christian that Im even having trouble believing that china students could be christians but in front of me was 1 of God's most treasured sons. I always believed that to show everyone how good God is, we are to be the living examples and he is 1 such person. He is always cheerful, never really bothered/stressed out by stuff and has a very good attitude. I see his love for God in him and I see God's favour & love for him.
We bought our food and ate and talked about God. About our experiences with God''s love for us.
I didnt wanna preach. In fact I wasnt. I was just saying what I felt like saying..my history, my beliefs, my thoughts. Like any other person would say to other people. Only diff is mine was full of God at that time. We exchanged ideas and when ideas differed, we talked it out and raised questions on why it differed and whether it could have been due to other reasons...nothing rocket science really.
But end of it all..when he left at his stop (yes we talked allt he way to the mrt station and on the train) We both agreed that talking about God made us so full. The fullness was different from having a hearty dinner...it felt like the day was complete after talking about God. Like that was what I needed to complete a day perfectly.
As the train moved on..I still smiled to myself at this feeling. Nevermind the srtess I had in the day. Nevermind the troubles I felt brewing in my heart..nevermind the things I kept reminding myself to do the next day..the whole "to do"list floating in my head. After talking about God...I was at peace.
Sounds absurd and you might call me extreme christian... Maybe... I wont say Im extreme coz there are other more extreme things that people do for their gods. Even christians for their version of God. But for me..if I can feel His love float around me after talking about Him..Wow!
In fact I find it easier to talk to a christian about God..than to a non-christian about God.
After writing all this..I changed the title to what it is now. Brings a smile to my face. If God is omni present and if 2 or more are gathered in His name He is there, then that means as we talked, God was there. God was with us at Subway. God was with us at the train station and in the train. Wow! And I bet He wasnt hungry... I bet anything in this world that He was smiling. Looking at 2 of his children talking about Him and discussing about Him and eventually feeling His love for us. Wow!
As the bible said about Jesus when He was in hungry and set by a well while his disciples when to get Him food. Then a Samaritan woman came by to draw water from the well. They talked and Jesus told her about God, Him and Him as the Living water that no one would ever thirst again with Him. The Samaritan woman was so excited she went about the town announcing that she say Jesus and beckoning everyone to see Him. By the time Jesus disciples were back with food, Jesus was no longer hungry. He had food to eat that the disciples didnt know about.
I dont think it was material/physical food that Jesus had before the disciples came back. But the spiritual food He had when preached to the Samaritan woman. Same fullness I encountered.
I bet every pastor who believes the right way...would feel the fulness in their innermost..after a good hearty bout of preaching God's love. Wow!
So as God sat with us and watched us discuss about Him, Im absolutely sure He wasnt hungry. And Im sooo sure that Hewas filling us up at the same time. Wow!
Im feeing full now.
K well lots more to talk about but I wont be getting much internet connection these 3 days so bear with me. More to come on friday night.
God Bless
It wasnt planned. alike most of my dinners w my students that are spur of the moment things.
I walked by the club house hungry but too late to go home and declare that i havnt eaten..hence I "jio"ed whoever was in the clubhouse who didnt mind eating w their "fierce" officer..for dinner.
Turns out only 1. A young ever-cheerful china christian boy.
Dont get your mind into crazy thoughts yah. Everything is as it is and no funny ideas.
The 2 of us walked to the mrt station enthusiastically for the sole purpose of getting to somewhere to appease our angry stomachs.
In my hands as I walked..were some stuff I printed out abt various well known pastors. All strong faithed pastors who have moved the world and yet suffer the criticism and condemnation by fellow pastors and non-christians. (tell you that in another session. Havnt finished reading them) So when he saw what I was reading, we started on the topic of God.
Bear in mind that Im so bad a christian that Im even having trouble believing that china students could be christians but in front of me was 1 of God's most treasured sons. I always believed that to show everyone how good God is, we are to be the living examples and he is 1 such person. He is always cheerful, never really bothered/stressed out by stuff and has a very good attitude. I see his love for God in him and I see God's favour & love for him.
We bought our food and ate and talked about God. About our experiences with God''s love for us.
I didnt wanna preach. In fact I wasnt. I was just saying what I felt like saying..my history, my beliefs, my thoughts. Like any other person would say to other people. Only diff is mine was full of God at that time. We exchanged ideas and when ideas differed, we talked it out and raised questions on why it differed and whether it could have been due to other reasons...nothing rocket science really.
But end of it all..when he left at his stop (yes we talked allt he way to the mrt station and on the train) We both agreed that talking about God made us so full. The fullness was different from having a hearty dinner...it felt like the day was complete after talking about God. Like that was what I needed to complete a day perfectly.
As the train moved on..I still smiled to myself at this feeling. Nevermind the srtess I had in the day. Nevermind the troubles I felt brewing in my heart..nevermind the things I kept reminding myself to do the next day..the whole "to do"list floating in my head. After talking about God...I was at peace.
Sounds absurd and you might call me extreme christian... Maybe... I wont say Im extreme coz there are other more extreme things that people do for their gods. Even christians for their version of God. But for me..if I can feel His love float around me after talking about Him..Wow!
In fact I find it easier to talk to a christian about God..than to a non-christian about God.
After writing all this..I changed the title to what it is now. Brings a smile to my face. If God is omni present and if 2 or more are gathered in His name He is there, then that means as we talked, God was there. God was with us at Subway. God was with us at the train station and in the train. Wow! And I bet He wasnt hungry... I bet anything in this world that He was smiling. Looking at 2 of his children talking about Him and discussing about Him and eventually feeling His love for us. Wow!
As the bible said about Jesus when He was in hungry and set by a well while his disciples when to get Him food. Then a Samaritan woman came by to draw water from the well. They talked and Jesus told her about God, Him and Him as the Living water that no one would ever thirst again with Him. The Samaritan woman was so excited she went about the town announcing that she say Jesus and beckoning everyone to see Him. By the time Jesus disciples were back with food, Jesus was no longer hungry. He had food to eat that the disciples didnt know about.
I dont think it was material/physical food that Jesus had before the disciples came back. But the spiritual food He had when preached to the Samaritan woman. Same fullness I encountered.
I bet every pastor who believes the right way...would feel the fulness in their innermost..after a good hearty bout of preaching God's love. Wow!
So as God sat with us and watched us discuss about Him, Im absolutely sure He wasnt hungry. And Im sooo sure that Hewas filling us up at the same time. Wow!
Im feeing full now.
K well lots more to talk about but I wont be getting much internet connection these 3 days so bear with me. More to come on friday night.
God Bless
Saturday, March 07, 2009
rainbow part2
i was so amazed byt he rainbow that ic udnt help but stare at it and hope to absord as much of that image has possible..maybe if i stared long enough,t he image would stay in my head more. But nothing beats seeing it live! no matter how many times I see it live, it never fails to make me smile and gaze with amazement and be thankful of God's love.
I looked around to see if anyone noticed the rainbow but only a few of them. most of them who did, took a pic of it but the tohers who didnt...evidently had other things on their mind.
Which leads me to conclude that so many of us are soooo taken up by our work or family or etc that we dont look up to see around us...if they had looked up, they would have seen a very vivid rainbow that God probably wanted us to see..to tell us no matter what happens in our lives, we would still have God to be on our side..his peace and even shows him watching over us.
What others say about God just creating the world and then letting it run on its own....RUBBISH!
So the people in the train..just kept looking and doing their own stuff while I was the only goon w my face pasted to the window of the mrt and chasing the rainbow around till it dissappeared...
Ever wondered why the rainbow has bright primary collours? why not dull ones? Maybe its meant to make us smile..ever wondered why its always after rain and yet...there is never a cloudless sky on a rainbowed day. Does this mean that even while ur life is clouded and u dont see the bright sky...rest assured that at the end of a rainy day...there is a rainbow. or rather through the clouds will a rainbow emerge.
I believe that a rainbow is something god does to make us feel peace and smile..just like how someone who cares for you..tries to comfort u, cheer u up when ur down...
And i also believe that w breeze is God's way of hugging u...
After all everything is made by God...
I love my God!
Ning
I looked around to see if anyone noticed the rainbow but only a few of them. most of them who did, took a pic of it but the tohers who didnt...evidently had other things on their mind.
Which leads me to conclude that so many of us are soooo taken up by our work or family or etc that we dont look up to see around us...if they had looked up, they would have seen a very vivid rainbow that God probably wanted us to see..to tell us no matter what happens in our lives, we would still have God to be on our side..his peace and even shows him watching over us.
What others say about God just creating the world and then letting it run on its own....RUBBISH!
So the people in the train..just kept looking and doing their own stuff while I was the only goon w my face pasted to the window of the mrt and chasing the rainbow around till it dissappeared...
Ever wondered why the rainbow has bright primary collours? why not dull ones? Maybe its meant to make us smile..ever wondered why its always after rain and yet...there is never a cloudless sky on a rainbowed day. Does this mean that even while ur life is clouded and u dont see the bright sky...rest assured that at the end of a rainy day...there is a rainbow. or rather through the clouds will a rainbow emerge.
I believe that a rainbow is something god does to make us feel peace and smile..just like how someone who cares for you..tries to comfort u, cheer u up when ur down...
And i also believe that w breeze is God's way of hugging u...
After all everything is made by God...
I love my God!
Ning
Friday, March 06, 2009
Rainbows are the most beautiful things...
For hte last 2 weeks Ive been thinking abt the rainbows...
2 weeks back on a wed/thur..there were 2 rainbows up in the sky...the bigger one was so clear that it looked like it was from a nippon paint ad and someone had used a roller and painted the rainbow unto the sky.
I think everyone who knows abt Jesus would also know how significant a rainbow is to us. For thsoe that dont know, at the end of the flood hat killed all mankind and animals and etc except oah and his family and paris of every kind of animal, God gave themt he rainbow as a sign of peace between Him and mankind and that He would never do anything like that to all mankaind anymore. So that rainbow is a sign or a standing agreement that while it may rain..while things may go wrong..it would never consume us...for those who believe in God.
Monday, February 23, 2009
God and reminiscing
So Sunday was a really good day. Had choir service in the afternoon so went for the morning 1 with my sista.
It being her 1st time, I tried to explain to her on how the church works and believes. Pastor was especially funny that day! The whole time that I was wondering if my sista could take the message....which I hope she did...but I thought to myself that instead of wondering if asking her to go to my church this week was a bad idea...I left it to God. I know god knows who's coming to church and that he pays extra attention to the newbies to make sure the msg is palatable for them. Which is why Pastor was so funny. Pastor probably doesnt know..but the way he preached..helped lighten the mood for newbies..help them to feel at ease. im soo glad that my sista didnt seem uncomfortable. I hope not..
During the worship..while I cast my worries to God and just sang out loud to Jesus and praised His name...think I heard my sista sing too! Despite not knowing the tune well, she still sang out loud and that made me relieved and happy. Dont know if she felt uncomfortable and forced to conform to the masses...but by the end of the service..it sounded like she felt it.
I know I felt loved by Jesus...I know I sang till I teared..know how much he has loved me and brought me to where I am..the long winding road that I mayb often feel like Im alone..but He never fails to remind me that He is there. Yes Jesus does love me.
And as I thought abt my sista and wondering if she was okay and she had felt God's love...in my head the image of God's angels' holding her as she sang along..Jesus hugging her as she stood there. And I wonder if at any time..she held felt the warmth of God.
What Pastor never fails to do..is to make clear God's love for us..the one thing that can give us peace and reassurance in a time of finanical crisis etc.
I stand by the belief that its not what you do but your intention of doing it that makes it a good or bad thing.
Anyway after the service, I had to go for choir. Like the morning service, I felt so much love while singing that I did tear. Tears of joy! Something about singing in front of the congregation and through your voice and facial expression, showing them how much Jesus loves you...makes it so fulfilling. Because you are the evidence to all that Jesus does love mankind...an uplifting feeling. When people say music is food for the soul..it is true too. The heavenliest of music somehow touches our hearts. I wont deny that even now..as I hear the church sing classic hymns like "Jesus Loves Me This I Know..For The Bible Tells Me So" or "Amazing Grace" I get brought back to my childhood days and instantly I become more like the small child by God's side.
Which is what he wants..us to be his children..to lean on Him as children lean on their parents for comfort. What a wonderful feeling to have a godly father who cares for you and wraps you with the wind of the world! Yes Jesus does love me!
Okay so another thing was that I was thinking abt the past. Was on facebook and had a msg from my ex. Happily replied with no other intention at all except to keep in touch.
The feeling is a good "brotherly" feeling. How do I know? Coz before I saw the mail, I did bump into a student of mine whom Ive developed a "love - hate relationship" with. Alike the other bros I have made whom I am close to. I treasure the special sibling relationship I have with them and it really is nothing more than siblings but I feel as if Ive known them since childhood days..and while I joke with them..it doesnt seem like we have any age, mental gap etc..despite age difference! Some of them are lots younger. some of htem are same age..etc. I love my sistas the same way! And my students!
Im thankful of having developed this expressive love from my american cousins and auntie and uncle...that hugs are fine, saying"I love you" is fine. Done in the right way of course!
As for my ex (who was, is and always will be my bestest best bro), I still feel like I cud tell him everything! Hahah How good is it to come to that stage where its talkable! Where I have the urge to call him for a coffee and chat! And because we were in the same club and know the same pple, theres much to talk abt. I can even talk to him abt my feelings and reflections! But he is however abroad hahaha..cant afford long distance call.
So what I draw from these 2 days...I see God's work in me. I see myself as having been a blessing to certain people at certain times..I see His love for those around me...and I see how He has really healed me from within. I see his work on others and in me. And I see his blessings for me manifesting!
I could pretty much send an email to my ex and say that Ive come to the point of origin (meaning the original sibling feelings for him) and totally mean it and not feel embarassed to say hi to his gf or mum or anybody else! What would be the gap now is if he doesnt feel comfortable about even that.
All in all, I will cast this to God.
Yes God is good!
God Bless!
It being her 1st time, I tried to explain to her on how the church works and believes. Pastor was especially funny that day! The whole time that I was wondering if my sista could take the message....which I hope she did...but I thought to myself that instead of wondering if asking her to go to my church this week was a bad idea...I left it to God. I know god knows who's coming to church and that he pays extra attention to the newbies to make sure the msg is palatable for them. Which is why Pastor was so funny. Pastor probably doesnt know..but the way he preached..helped lighten the mood for newbies..help them to feel at ease. im soo glad that my sista didnt seem uncomfortable. I hope not..
During the worship..while I cast my worries to God and just sang out loud to Jesus and praised His name...think I heard my sista sing too! Despite not knowing the tune well, she still sang out loud and that made me relieved and happy. Dont know if she felt uncomfortable and forced to conform to the masses...but by the end of the service..it sounded like she felt it.
I know I felt loved by Jesus...I know I sang till I teared..know how much he has loved me and brought me to where I am..the long winding road that I mayb often feel like Im alone..but He never fails to remind me that He is there. Yes Jesus does love me.
And as I thought abt my sista and wondering if she was okay and she had felt God's love...in my head the image of God's angels' holding her as she sang along..Jesus hugging her as she stood there. And I wonder if at any time..she held felt the warmth of God.
What Pastor never fails to do..is to make clear God's love for us..the one thing that can give us peace and reassurance in a time of finanical crisis etc.
I stand by the belief that its not what you do but your intention of doing it that makes it a good or bad thing.
Anyway after the service, I had to go for choir. Like the morning service, I felt so much love while singing that I did tear. Tears of joy! Something about singing in front of the congregation and through your voice and facial expression, showing them how much Jesus loves you...makes it so fulfilling. Because you are the evidence to all that Jesus does love mankind...an uplifting feeling. When people say music is food for the soul..it is true too. The heavenliest of music somehow touches our hearts. I wont deny that even now..as I hear the church sing classic hymns like "Jesus Loves Me This I Know..For The Bible Tells Me So" or "Amazing Grace" I get brought back to my childhood days and instantly I become more like the small child by God's side.
Which is what he wants..us to be his children..to lean on Him as children lean on their parents for comfort. What a wonderful feeling to have a godly father who cares for you and wraps you with the wind of the world! Yes Jesus does love me!
Okay so another thing was that I was thinking abt the past. Was on facebook and had a msg from my ex. Happily replied with no other intention at all except to keep in touch.
The feeling is a good "brotherly" feeling. How do I know? Coz before I saw the mail, I did bump into a student of mine whom Ive developed a "love - hate relationship" with. Alike the other bros I have made whom I am close to. I treasure the special sibling relationship I have with them and it really is nothing more than siblings but I feel as if Ive known them since childhood days..and while I joke with them..it doesnt seem like we have any age, mental gap etc..despite age difference! Some of them are lots younger. some of htem are same age..etc. I love my sistas the same way! And my students!
Im thankful of having developed this expressive love from my american cousins and auntie and uncle...that hugs are fine, saying"I love you" is fine. Done in the right way of course!
As for my ex (who was, is and always will be my bestest best bro), I still feel like I cud tell him everything! Hahah How good is it to come to that stage where its talkable! Where I have the urge to call him for a coffee and chat! And because we were in the same club and know the same pple, theres much to talk abt. I can even talk to him abt my feelings and reflections! But he is however abroad hahaha..cant afford long distance call.
So what I draw from these 2 days...I see God's work in me. I see myself as having been a blessing to certain people at certain times..I see His love for those around me...and I see how He has really healed me from within. I see his work on others and in me. And I see his blessings for me manifesting!
I could pretty much send an email to my ex and say that Ive come to the point of origin (meaning the original sibling feelings for him) and totally mean it and not feel embarassed to say hi to his gf or mum or anybody else! What would be the gap now is if he doesnt feel comfortable about even that.
All in all, I will cast this to God.
Yes God is good!
God Bless!
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