friday and saturday

friday was ISC AGM. I had fun and I was happy but I was also abit sad because the fact that the year3s were leaving soon was hitting me. The more i think abt the year3s being my 1st bath of year1s and how they've grown....the more I feel the sweet and sour.
All of thejm are dear to me and I wisht hemt he best but also know that ISC would eb very different without them. I am soooo proud of them and how far they've come! And osmetimes I feel liek Ih avnt bene there enough.
Of course I would love to be with them alt he time becauxse they're such nice people to be with...fun and spontaneous...but I cant because my work doesnt allow me to.
As we took pictures, they sang, " Shi Shang Zi You Ma Ma Hao" which isnt the right song for me but at that point I guess i didnt cared. Everything that I have felt or doen for this bunch..the late nights etc....worth it.
I wonder abt he juniors. how they will fill the big boots of this batch.
Because I think deep down..I dont think Im doing a good job at leading these students...God help me. I need His wisdom!

Saturday (Today) met my sec sch friends or aka sistas for breakfast. Pity we couldnt get all 4 down but Im happy with what we have. Its good to have a small reunion even if it means breakfast only. To talk abt how we're doing now etc.

I go home and my dad gives me a one-liner that shws he's not happy that I went to have breakfast.

So Im between feeling happy with the prized gathering and irriated that my dad is this way. Somehow I feel he doesnt realize that every person has a time in their lives where they want to be with friends or want to go out and explore. And if tis not done in a young age then its done in the older age but it will be done before someone focuses on this family..if not they havnt lived

Its times like these that I could feel condemned and it sucks. I guess its true..the more critical you are of yourself, the more self condemning you are, the smaller a person and the weaker a person you become. Like in my JC years and my last year of Poly.
Its harder to get out of this pithole than it seems...

I guess out fo all this I should thank God for being there for me. Providing me witht he skills to lead and providing mee with the strength and courage to believe in myself...