today was not great

CCA Showcase day 2... day 1 was okay..not very stressful...still enjoyable..

Today was not as smooth.

As i was on teh train...I teared. Not stressed...just tired...And irritated that I wasnt good enough.

Speaking of good enough, 1 of my girls said she wanted to lose weight because she wanted to prove to her ex bf that she was better off w/o him. Lose 12 kg!
All in all, the aim objective is for him. After all the time trying to let go..and she is still doing stuff for him.
BTW let me just say that this girl of mine is a pretty, fun and sporty girl and and guy in the right frame of mine and right heart would want her as a gf but the ass of an ex dumped her for other girls.
Im not against losing weight. Im against losing ALOT of weight for a person who doesnt care abt u anymore but whom u still care abt. (at least enough to bother abt what he thinks)
If I had a chance to talk tot he ex bf, Id say "In a month or 2, you'd realize that slim girls are only so slim coz thhey hae nothing inside to show for. And our girl has left only to see u for who u really are!" A skirt chasing loser.

So as I was abt to say before i stated my views...I was abit sad and dissappointed w myself at the end of the day. I was on the train and I listened to hillsong songs. As i leaned forward and looked down at my hand..I counted 5 fingers.
5= number of grace in the bible
If 5 is grace...then why do we have 5 fingers per hand?
then i picked up my other hand and saw in both hands (as I had them side by side)..10 fingers
10= number of ten commandements..of law..of fulfilling the demands of the law by ur own efforts
And it hit me..or maybe the Holy Spirit told me...

Every hand has 5 fingers for us to do our work in God's grace. Notice that the lightest works we do are done w mostly 1 hand? 5 fingers..

But when we have to exert more strength and time and effort into stuff..its like carrying a HUGE crate of things/burdens/responsibilities. We need both hands..10 fingers
Doing all the extra time, slogging like crazy and having the mentality that we have to use our own effort to make things right..instead of depending on God's grace.
Stressing on stuff, getting little pay, worrying etc etc etc all 10 fingers..

All God wants us to do is be conscious that He has finished all our works and we should not be worrying abt life when we are already placed in the finished work.. All we need to do then do is give Him praise. Praise Him for His grace and His provisions and His fulfilling hos part of labour sot hat we can be at peace when faced w probems and we can throw them to Him.
And as we lift our hands to praise Him, both hands high up ands arm wide open to form not 10 fingers...but 2 seperate hands...2 times of 5 fingers=double grace.
Double grace = double blessings = double peace = double everything God will give. And mind you..God is willing to give everything....so long as we ask and believe.

Double grace to accomplice double things w the same strength or same stuff w half hte effort. Double grace for our problems to be solved and more strength to do other stuff we like.
Surely the time we give to praise Him is not lost time..but it means that we gain more time for other things..

As the idea soaked in...I smiled. :) I smiled
I smiled at God's assurance that He loves me and that I am His child. Amen!!!


God Bless!