To my dear Soni...

Like I said, we are sooo similar in character that it amazes me every time.

You are truly like my twin from India. Because of you, India is a closer place in my heart.

As for what you are facing now, I can't say that I understand exactly how you feel but I can understand how nasty it is. How it makes you want to cry till your heart is emptied and your lungs are emptied..then inhale and want to empty your lung and tears all over again.

I understand how many days would be spent conjuring up courage and strength in the day...and then curling up in tears at night...

I understand how hearing a song could make your heart skip a beat and sink with sadness

I understand that going to places that you and him had memories could conjure up sad memories

I understand that the mere mention of his name could bring you down fr the rest of the day..

I understand that you miss him a lot especially when you need someone to talk to but the only one you wanna speak to is him...

I understand all that...and remember that that is normal for someone who has gotten out of such a strong relationship.

Remember that it takes time to heal. Sometimes it takes years... It doesn't mean you're weak. It means that the relationship meant a lot to you.

Remember that through your process of recovery, there will be days that you feel powerless and slip back to depression. Its normal. Its like a whirlpool where you fight and fight hour by hour to keep strong but just when you feel that you're safe and you can rest, you get pulled in again. BUT you will never be as deep in as the first time and your dips will always be easier to handle than the previous. Because every dip makes you stronger. In due time you will realise that he time for you to recover from a dip is lesser. from 2 days to 1 day to half a day to hours...

Remember that you are strong...regardless of how many dips you;ve had. That there are people out there who go through similar shit. Not many though..and this shit is uncommon...BUT those who do go through it..survive.

Remember that its easy to think that nobody would understand just how deep deep deep this love meant to you and no words can be expressed to even scratch the surface of how deep the love is....but there will be someone who understands. And even if he/she doesn't understand, having them by you to hear you vent or be with you when u cry...will help you. They don't have to talk because sometimes their talking doesn't help either. But them physically being there to listen and be with you wil help.

Remember to keep your heart open to all the other forms of love because tears can blind you from realising that people do care about you and love you and want to be there for you.

Remember who you are as an individual. Challenge yourself and learn new things because that way, you will rediscover who you are as an individual. That you don't need him to survive. That without him, you can still build your life.

Rememebr you are a fighter. You have a strong, mature, level headed personality. You have people around the world who love you. You have travelled the world and experienced things that not many people have done. You have succeeded in doing many things that others might not have a chance int eh lifetime or even guts to do. e.g.: bungee jumping!

Remember what things make you happy. Indulging in them once in awhile will make you happier.

I love you loads Sista! You have been my best friend in Sydney and I thank God that we had each other in Sydney because I couldn't imagine having any other person as a housemate, friend and sister. This is what lifelong friends are made of. :) HUGS

Anytime u feel you wanna vent, email me. no matter how long it is. no matter how many tears are shred while typing it, no matter if its addressed to me or him..no matter how much its filled with missings or hate etc etc. I won't mind because Ive had my fair share of such things too. And if it helps, it helps. :)

God Bless!