Having recently caught up with the guy that I actually do like, I now realized just how different it was hanging out with someone I love vs someone who was approaching this in the wrong way.... I guess the "nervousn and excited" syndrome only happens for people who impress me with character and humour.
This time, I left our meet up thinking " to death dude. loving you to death"
That said, this guy sees me as nothing but a sister... I guess... I can live with that. As long as I know that this guy doesn't just see me as an acquaintance, then I'm fine. I think.
After all, this person is really too dear to my heart for me to lose and I have lost a bestest best brother before and it pulled me down like quick sand. I gotta say that at times, it does feel like the time when I lost my bestest best brother.... only that now..I sorta know when I need to pull myself back from the edge...
Of course, I will be happy for him or them, when they finally find someone :) Because why shouldnt I? I'm sure I would have to learn to get used to not having the same amount of hangout time etc but the important thing is that they are happy.
As I told someone recently, I dont know if Im asking too much but all I want, is for the guy to be my best friend... the same person that I can speak anything to without thinking that he'll judge... that I can truly just be myself... Whom I wont feel like I'm taking precious time from.
Gonna leave this problem to God...
Ning
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