Is it a sin?

I wonder what will happen if I blog in work...will I get fired? Freedom of speech? Not like Im commiting defamation... how?

Read my bro's blog and He commented on how happy He is of me wanting to get baptised. Surprise surprise! Obviously He doesnt read my blog entries. Not that I resent it but I guess its been something Ive been thinking of for years...yet..somehow Ive always had a hesitance. i wanna do it willingly and not that I shud..theres a dff doing in because you want to and because you need to. I want to. I finally want to!

as for all other things..I dont know why Im built in a way where I learn things the hard way...I do things my way and do what I like...(irony for eveyrone who thinks that Im trying to control them) Is it cause since young, I wasnt allowed to do things I wanted to? Raised a rebel? Is this gonna hurt my future? I think so...I dont think much about it but when I do and when people try to convince me and advse me...I go back into the contemplative mood...should i or should I not? Or should I follow the convensional way? did my having an ex indian bf result of this?

Am i so idealistic that I cant tell when someone is trying to make use of me? eerytime I tnk of this, I know what calms me dwn..is that God has brought me here...if so, He has is reasons..and He has his own way of making me come out victorious! I praise God for that...I praise Him for my tough situations because its at these times that I take refuge in His care over me. Its not foolish escape coz everytime Im in trouble, He always takse me out from it.

Anyway..my mood is abit low now...I dont exactly know what to do now...but I believe in God. And thats all I need...

God Bless