Wait up man! Why are you running so fast?

Time.....

My office is a bloody mess...(hard drive not connected to lap top..lazy to connect..show you pic next time)

Just got back fromt he library..helluva lot of dvds..that my lap top cant play...blasted format zones...TV is busted, no dvd player....no money...hell ya..im having a "great" time
"sounds like teenage angst"

Anyway..vesak day sucked...Im not a believer of it but even still it sucked coz I had to go back to work to perform. I love to perform mind you...but this time..its got more connotations (non-high frequency-ish" its work, its thinking of relationships, its committement...
Had a tough time getting musical members to help me..seems like a handfull of them pick up their phones to start with....out of the handfull, a pinch of them reply with a "yes"..out of the pinch who said "yes"....1/3 of them quit last minute...well...maybe more like last second...or 1 and 1/2 hours after that...
Facing times like these...I have to wonder whether im the only one who sticks by her committements..or do I. All i know is that when I promise that I'll be there to help a person...when they really really "hell ya" need it...I act on it....or am I a hypocrite.
I so, I was eating my own shoe by the time the performance started. My face was charcoal black and my mood was int he pits...
I guess the only thing that got me back on the track..is that my giving my best, I wud be doing someone proud. its a solemn vow on my end hat someone doesnt know...but my utter respect for the person....I will do it...

This committememnt prob has been bugging me for a long time....in all sorts of ways...my SPARC and comperes juniors have their committement probs....
The "just passed" interview was the time I felt the most crucial in getting peoplewho really meant it..pity is that we didnt have enough time to host 3-4 rounds..maybe then more enthusiastic poeple wud have been given a chance to prove their worth...but now...camp is coming ahead...
I forsee problems (already happening actually) but I forsee victories...I see the standard of both clubs slowly climbing up to greater heights...just by their committement.
In fact...having had all the discussions and talks between members and ex-co and etc...what I see and what they finally realize..is that with true committement....alot of our problems are solved....I can only tell them one thing..."OWN IT"

Since taking on SPARC and Comperes..Ive contantly asked myself if I am being hypocritical or having too high hopes of them...I searched through all my explanations to myself on why I get frustrated easily with them..and why...they seemeso stressed with them.
well guys, theres nothing to be stressed about...lets just say that I see how high you can be....frustration is part of trying to get you guys there....I dont believe that students can only go so far....I believe that where is a will and committement...students can still reach the standard of pros...where professionalism is concerned...it isnt just about having experience, but acting like you can handle experiences...afterall...how does a pro become a pro unless it was an amateur to start with?

This year's Singapore River Raft Race was a moment that woke me up to what Comperes lacked...the guts... I cant say Im as brave as any other guys...but I will say that when I was in comperes, I bit onto any event I was given..some small, some big, some inactive, some exciting and fulfilling... I was a tad bit upset with my comperes because they backed out of a chance to take over the mic from Jeremy Ratnam... As for the juniors..they didnt even bother to come and watch Jeremy and Loretta do the running commentary! It was a yearly chance to see pro in action. The reasons I got form those who were there but didnt wanna try out the mic.... "jeremy and loretta are pros, they've done it for years..how can we match up? "
If they can only see that matching up to their level isnt the point...its trying to match up....that is what I want to see...

That is the goal I want the SPARC and Comperes to see....

- To OWN their events (have committement and responsibility for their duties, discipline)
- To have the guts to try at any given opportunity... failing is no issue
- To find the love in your duty

I sorta wished I was not working in SP when it comes to Sparc and Comperes..not because I dont wanna be with them....but because I want to...more than my regular time...how ironic...

Watched Devdas, Black and Kuch Kuch Hota Hai for the past few days...black was inspirational...the other 2 are silly and sad love stories....

Having trying to search for good movies to watch..I realize that my favourite movies these days always come with elaborate settings and fantasy lands..etc...Pans Labyrinth, Alice in Wonderland, Pirates of the Carribean, etc... I used to like love stories..then they got boring and cliched, classics got to classical, old movies got boring after awhile...even animation can seem..almost allt he same at times....funny how my love for films is starting to move back to non-reality...

ANYWAY...got work to do..see ya...