I believe that theres no point in me asking people abt soethign I already know abt them. if they wont tell then so be it. Im fine. I take it as somethign Im not meant to know and leave it as it is. I'll keep my eyes closed and ears closed...not until the person says it, will I do, " oh really?" Hypocritical? Not really....
Anyway..learnt abt some stuff today that got me thinking..cant tell you what coz as it is, Its top secret..Id have to kill you if I told you. In fact I shud be killed for knowing. So why trouble everyone? let God bring me to a land of peace...
For the past few days...I've been praying for guidance...praying for faith...I know that God loves me and listens to all my troubles. He hears my thoughts and knows how I feel. But he also knows that things are done for a good or bad reason and If I were to pray for a group of boys to be shot dead along orchard road, I doubt He would do it. Coz its just wrong! But not every wish can be placed either on the black or white part...alot of these thigns that we pray for, are grey. We pray in jealousy, in anger, in vengence, in pride, in sin etc..and it makes me doubt myself on whether my prayers do get answered...since they are so filthy in men's own human desires. Come on! Test yourself! How many prayers do you pray that has all earnest good for mankind instead of yourself? Not many! And Im not counting in teh real christians! Those who truly love God and depend solely on Him for salvation. I have problem believing myself! Sad..but this is the honest truth! So....God, let not my will be done..but yours...I submit to your road for the belief that I am too unwise to decide which way is better. I know your road willbe fraught with troubles and trials but I accept it..I cant guarante that I will pass all of it...but I will try my best.
Guys..I knwo Ive changed alot since poly or the last you've seen me...and maybe some of you arent comfortable at all at my mention of God ...but...it is me....I am still Ning...and I still care for you guys...
gotta go. Take care dudes
LOVE
Anyway..learnt abt some stuff today that got me thinking..cant tell you what coz as it is, Its top secret..Id have to kill you if I told you. In fact I shud be killed for knowing. So why trouble everyone? let God bring me to a land of peace...
For the past few days...I've been praying for guidance...praying for faith...I know that God loves me and listens to all my troubles. He hears my thoughts and knows how I feel. But he also knows that things are done for a good or bad reason and If I were to pray for a group of boys to be shot dead along orchard road, I doubt He would do it. Coz its just wrong! But not every wish can be placed either on the black or white part...alot of these thigns that we pray for, are grey. We pray in jealousy, in anger, in vengence, in pride, in sin etc..and it makes me doubt myself on whether my prayers do get answered...since they are so filthy in men's own human desires. Come on! Test yourself! How many prayers do you pray that has all earnest good for mankind instead of yourself? Not many! And Im not counting in teh real christians! Those who truly love God and depend solely on Him for salvation. I have problem believing myself! Sad..but this is the honest truth! So....God, let not my will be done..but yours...I submit to your road for the belief that I am too unwise to decide which way is better. I know your road willbe fraught with troubles and trials but I accept it..I cant guarante that I will pass all of it...but I will try my best.
Guys..I knwo Ive changed alot since poly or the last you've seen me...and maybe some of you arent comfortable at all at my mention of God ...but...it is me....I am still Ning...and I still care for you guys...
gotta go. Take care dudes
LOVE
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