So..I cant show you guys any pictures because my dear dear Baiee has yet to pass em to us :)
K the whole story in full!!!
Went w 2 of my bros, Edwin n Saad 1st. Met them at Kranji and I dont know why but the moement I saw them, my heart was instantly lightened..how fortunate to have these brosto celebrate w me. Eviedntly, they're indian..in fact all those who went, were indian! But I was amongst the safest group of pple I know! They dont do drugs, dont drink, dont smoke (not anymore), dont do crime! I know I sound bad but alot of pple ahve hat impressiona nd Im gonna state that they are absolutely not like that! I stand up for them!
Anyway enough of digressing, we went to the customs, easy and fast, in no time we were in JB.
Funny really coz having these 3 bros w me, I felt like I was...a VIP! 2 bodyguards w shades n stuff... Hahahaha totally comical hahaha coz both of them are big friendly giants hahahahahaEsp Saad hahahahaha
Went to change $ and took a cab to the place we rent our car. The car was an old Proton, squeeky, and hard to start but it had a bloody good sound system and aircon! Who could ask for more! The most impt thing was it had brakes! The owner oft he car checked the passports and driving licence of my frens and commented I was indonesian hahaha not to mentiont hat I was Chantek! Wahahahaha for those of you who dont know..chantek=beautiful :D
Anyway..off we went! Dropped by at a petrol station to fill up the gas, and loh and behold, my 2nd pleasure of the day.....A&W!!!! :P The 1st pleasure was the car ride...
A&W rootbeer and waffle ice-cream!!!! Soo tempted to buy a meal n get an A&W teddy bear!!!
Happy and excited, and cutting the waffle while in a shaky car w potholed roads..etc hahah I was DAMN HAPPY! The next stop, wud be back to where we started! City Square! To meet the sistas of mine whom I so adore till my innards fall out! Cal as usual in her retro yet classy attire and Naz in her usual classy and hot attire..plus a fren! Saaf! Well, Im okay, the more the merrier I guess :P But the small prob abt fitting 5 in a car.
We had Portuguese egg tarts. (Edwin guarantees that it tastes better than it looks) The girls were practically stuffing me w egg tart! An appetizer and then,...the surprise! I never saw it coming..much as I begged the girls t tell me...cudnt get it out of them. Fine! Some sistas! hahahaha Loh n behold, they had a cake prepared for me at Secret Recipe!!!! My Fav Chocolate Banana cake!!!!WAAAAHHHHH I got a shock! Dont now if my eyes were bigger but I was definitely shocked. but the shock IMMEDIATELY turned to suspiscion...Any big cake w a mountain high of serviettes means something! It means ...Im about to get a facial..whether I like it or not!!! I received the present they shared and held it w both hands, in front of me as I gave everyone the *I know what your up to" look...
As I opened the present, surprise 2 came up...the MJ Jersey I waned to get...Edwin said someone hadbought it...WHITE LIE! he didnt sayt he someone was him! They all shared an MJ Jersey for me! WHAT THE! I was stunned!!! Att hat exact moment......dust got into my eye...a persistent one too...coz I cudnt seem to get it out! my sistas on my left n right and my bros in front of me...I felt...beyond happy... Needless to say..I was sitting int he middle and against a window..thus...TRAPPED!!! Cake cake and more cake. Everybody contributed a piece of caketo my face..till I was more looking more indian than chinese! (Hehehe sorry guys! But I am half indian rite.) And if that wasnt enough, the manager (whom Ive met n spoken to before) decided to help us celebrate by CONTRIBUTING a whole plate PILED TO THE HEAVENS with WHIPPED CREAM!!!!!!
As the saying goes...if you cant beat em. join em.....okay..thats not right....more like...If someone slaps you on the left cheek, turn your right cheek for them to slap as well....k not that accurate....more like.....The more you struggle, the worse it gets. So dont struggle!...YES!!! I admit defeat! I counted to five and then held my nose as everyone attacked and smeared my face w whipped cream.... :/ What to do hahahaha Shirt, neck, face all got cream!
At least they helped me to wipe it off! hahahaha :) Sometimes, being sabohed on ur birthday is..a luxury. ...k forget I said that!!!!!
To end that cake session I commented, " You know..its funny. Coz Idont feel any dust in my eyes anymore!!!" We made soo much noise..I think the wole Secret Recipe and everyone who was eating there on that day wud rememebr us man!
After that, we ewnt to my bro's relatives place for real homecooked indian food! LOVED IT! Even had a photo taken w the relatives man! Too bad I missed the small girl hahaha Emm Daisy is her name...I think :P We watched tamil movie..I had to pester the rest to explain to me abt the movie! No english subtitles here yah. All malay.
After lunch, we drove to the NIKE factory. Bloody cheap stuff but nothing I fancied coz it wasnt on my "too buy" list. I will resist temptation!!! Aim: get swimming suit, food, facial prod etc..
By this time, our trusty car has a name...Amanaseri!!! (Thanks to a signboard advertising for the newly built estates, Amaseri) Took 3 pics sitting on the car hehehhe felt certaint he car hood wud collapse hehehehe But im still alive!!!
Went to JUSCO, got a swimming suit and 2 shirts :P when they cost S$4.50 a piece and are comfortable...heheh I just cudnt resist! :P
After JUSCO, we had to rush to customs...2 of my frens had to elave early and they were abt 2hrs late as it was... I cant help but feel guilty coz I wasthe one who delayed their time :(
Unfortunately...just as we wanted to get here fast, God was apparently unwilling hahahah We got lost twice hahahaha real funny man! hahaha Thanks to my two bros. No Worries! We just enojyed the car ride and the singing hahaha listening to bhangra and oldies...jazz..etc We were singing to "dont worry be happy", "what a wonderful world" Again my bro Edwin has outdone himself hahahah!
After dropping my sista n her fren off, we went to makan Ikan Bakar :P Wohooo!!! Olden day alley way stores..even divided ito the malay, chinese and indian alleys hahahahha The food was great! The company was excellent! under the stars...etc :) loved it!
Last stop...shopping..bought shades and...food for the office :P
I know Im boring you guys to death w an hour by hur account of that day but...Ic ant help it. Coz I cant describe how fortunate, how blessed I felt! I admit that as we were on the road and singing, I wished my ex was here..and when it so happened to be a song w some lyrics like " dont cry, I 'll be there for you etc...(cant exactly remember ...) I felt it more..i wished alot of my other frens were w us. :) Even a hug fromt hem wud have been able to reduce me to tears. hahahah No im not a cry baby....but I am sensitive...esp if I open my eyes even more to see how umch these guys went through to make sure I was happy!
I thin to them, they were celebrating my birthday, but to me..I think id be celebrating their frenship and love for me. The giggly, crapster me is back! :P I love these guys loads...no matter what colour their skin can be. I love them because they are true to themselves n true to me.
Att he end of the day,I got a postcard from them. :) A postcard I intend to frame or laminate..or if not..keep under lock and key with other memos n postcards that are important to me. :)
My birthday...was GREAT!!! Thank you SOOOOO MUCH guys! Thambi, you did an excellent job planning yah. I appreciate it alot!!! :) Rhomba Naandree!
LOVE
Monday, October 31, 2005
Sunday, October 30, 2005
If there be a dayt hat I cry both in joy n in sadness....this will be the day.
Honestly, I dont think i wanna care if my dad finds out that I went to JB... explain later...but heres wat happened.
Met my frens at Kranji, to go to JB. I dont know why...but just meeting with my frens..is like seeing a light... 1stt hing we had to do was rent a car...after which I cudnt believe my fortune to finally (after more than 10 years!!!) I got to eat A&W!!!!! Woohooooo!!!!!! Waffle with ice-cream and rootbeer float etc! love it!
We then went down to Secret Recipe where they had a surprise in store for me...a chocolate banana cake w some icing on it...Happy Birthday Ning, 22.... SURPRISE!!!! They gave me a present...MJ's jersey in Washington wizards!!!!! To do that, one of my bros wud have to travel back n forth to JB to get it for me coz thats where I saw it! In fact, thanks to my bro, he planned the whole thing and made that day one of the most memorable days of my life! :)
Needless to say, I got slammed w cake n whipped cream! But honestly..its really my 1st time! Hahaha not that im saying I want to be slammed w cake! :P Just that I always felt that someone actually taking effort to plan all this n slam u w cake..actually shows how close they are to you. That they wud even dare to pick up the cake! Hehehe but..enough of digging my own grave... :P
We shopped abit and then when to my bro's relatives house for lunch! Homemade indian food!! Wahahahaha At that point of time, I smelt of cake n whipped cream and my eyes were red w happy tears! :) I was beyond being touched...nothing cud hold back those beads of joy. :)
I had a delicious lunch, shared my cake witht he relatives because they invited us over even though they had no clue who we were and that there were soo many of us!!! I aws touched once again for their hospitality! :)
Afterwhich, we went abit of shopping again, alot of photos (the better and the ugly whipped cream ones etc) alot of joking, alot of singing in the car (like a family outing!), alot of laughs n etc! I just cudnt help but think of how fabulous my time was n feel like I wud tear again! So bad that I was choking on my singing. I didnt let the rest know I was getting emotional again actually...but Im sure they..sorta figured... :) I loev my group of frens...be they indian or malay or chinese...dark or mixed or white or milk choc, be they pakistani, isreali, french, portugese..etc..they can come from an oo loo island for all I care! But I love them! I only wish everyone else cud see what i see...esp my dad...
Had Ikan bakar for dinner, along a famous alley, otah..etc, did get some stuff I wanted...esp a swimming suit :P and I was ...satisfied! Being w my frens, celebrating w them, getting sabohed by them, taking pics w them, receiving so many smses of well wishes...
I cant sayt hat any other day was more fun and more looney than this! I had the time of my life simply w my frens!. No frills or wat,, just haing around in a car, getting lost, window shopping..etc....:) Sometimes I wished some other pple cud make it..but I know..not everything goes our way.
As for the tears of sadness, I got scolded by my dad for going off for the whole day. I dont really now exactly wat he means but i get this impression that he will not let me hang w my frens...He expects me to update him on where I go. How abt I call him and describe to him when I cross the traffic light or the next shop i enter or leave?!?!?! You know..i cried in my room toilet simply being pissed that Im still being scolded at like I was a 15yr old! EVEN 15 yr olds have more independence than I do! No questions asked! If things continue like this, I mght as well MARRY my own bloody father! Why not! I know I may sound petty but I hate it when they go, "you're still young!" F! Of course! Im younger than you! And I will stay younget than you! Does this mean I cant dow hat i want until you Fing DIE?!?!?!! (excuse my french) Im pissed...And I wished I cud tell my dad that he can wait for a call for all I care coz the more he forces me to REPORT to him, the more I will not! I refuse to be one oof those kids who has an invisible dog leash on their Fing necks! I refuse to be one fo thsoe who shudders w their fathers or mum's names! I HATE THAT!!!
So there you have..my happy n sad tears..all in one day... I dont need anything man. All i need is to be able to be with those I love...
Last but not least...Thank you soo much guys...for smsing me and trying to call me to wish me happy birthday. I didnt mean to not reply...my hp was erally n truly dead...Believe me when I say that every sms received and call received (before it died) adds alot to how good my day went. In the overall, it was an excellent day! the sms i received after I got home helped cool me down abit (aftermath of father's speech)
I know I only say it but dont do...that Id not give 2 hoots abt what my dad thinks...but I do. The hopelessly obedient and guilty conscience stricken me....maybe I shud really get married ot my dad...wat the fuck...Anyway...this day is officially over. Next year, i will promise myself to go clubbing for birthday! Clubbing or pubbing! I dont try to spite my dad..but this time, Im damn determined to do it! F!
LOVE n GOD BLESS!!!
(will elaborate more on my JB trip next time...and show some pics soon!)
Met my frens at Kranji, to go to JB. I dont know why...but just meeting with my frens..is like seeing a light... 1stt hing we had to do was rent a car...after which I cudnt believe my fortune to finally (after more than 10 years!!!) I got to eat A&W!!!!! Woohooooo!!!!!! Waffle with ice-cream and rootbeer float etc! love it!
We then went down to Secret Recipe where they had a surprise in store for me...a chocolate banana cake w some icing on it...Happy Birthday Ning, 22.... SURPRISE!!!! They gave me a present...MJ's jersey in Washington wizards!!!!! To do that, one of my bros wud have to travel back n forth to JB to get it for me coz thats where I saw it! In fact, thanks to my bro, he planned the whole thing and made that day one of the most memorable days of my life! :)
Needless to say, I got slammed w cake n whipped cream! But honestly..its really my 1st time! Hahaha not that im saying I want to be slammed w cake! :P Just that I always felt that someone actually taking effort to plan all this n slam u w cake..actually shows how close they are to you. That they wud even dare to pick up the cake! Hehehe but..enough of digging my own grave... :P
We shopped abit and then when to my bro's relatives house for lunch! Homemade indian food!! Wahahahaha At that point of time, I smelt of cake n whipped cream and my eyes were red w happy tears! :) I was beyond being touched...nothing cud hold back those beads of joy. :)
I had a delicious lunch, shared my cake witht he relatives because they invited us over even though they had no clue who we were and that there were soo many of us!!! I aws touched once again for their hospitality! :)
Afterwhich, we went abit of shopping again, alot of photos (the better and the ugly whipped cream ones etc) alot of joking, alot of singing in the car (like a family outing!), alot of laughs n etc! I just cudnt help but think of how fabulous my time was n feel like I wud tear again! So bad that I was choking on my singing. I didnt let the rest know I was getting emotional again actually...but Im sure they..sorta figured... :) I loev my group of frens...be they indian or malay or chinese...dark or mixed or white or milk choc, be they pakistani, isreali, french, portugese..etc..they can come from an oo loo island for all I care! But I love them! I only wish everyone else cud see what i see...esp my dad...
Had Ikan bakar for dinner, along a famous alley, otah..etc, did get some stuff I wanted...esp a swimming suit :P and I was ...satisfied! Being w my frens, celebrating w them, getting sabohed by them, taking pics w them, receiving so many smses of well wishes...
I cant sayt hat any other day was more fun and more looney than this! I had the time of my life simply w my frens!. No frills or wat,, just haing around in a car, getting lost, window shopping..etc....:) Sometimes I wished some other pple cud make it..but I know..not everything goes our way.
As for the tears of sadness, I got scolded by my dad for going off for the whole day. I dont really now exactly wat he means but i get this impression that he will not let me hang w my frens...He expects me to update him on where I go. How abt I call him and describe to him when I cross the traffic light or the next shop i enter or leave?!?!?! You know..i cried in my room toilet simply being pissed that Im still being scolded at like I was a 15yr old! EVEN 15 yr olds have more independence than I do! No questions asked! If things continue like this, I mght as well MARRY my own bloody father! Why not! I know I may sound petty but I hate it when they go, "you're still young!" F! Of course! Im younger than you! And I will stay younget than you! Does this mean I cant dow hat i want until you Fing DIE?!?!?!! (excuse my french) Im pissed...And I wished I cud tell my dad that he can wait for a call for all I care coz the more he forces me to REPORT to him, the more I will not! I refuse to be one oof those kids who has an invisible dog leash on their Fing necks! I refuse to be one fo thsoe who shudders w their fathers or mum's names! I HATE THAT!!!
So there you have..my happy n sad tears..all in one day... I dont need anything man. All i need is to be able to be with those I love...
Last but not least...Thank you soo much guys...for smsing me and trying to call me to wish me happy birthday. I didnt mean to not reply...my hp was erally n truly dead...Believe me when I say that every sms received and call received (before it died) adds alot to how good my day went. In the overall, it was an excellent day! the sms i received after I got home helped cool me down abit (aftermath of father's speech)
I know I only say it but dont do...that Id not give 2 hoots abt what my dad thinks...but I do. The hopelessly obedient and guilty conscience stricken me....maybe I shud really get married ot my dad...wat the fuck...Anyway...this day is officially over. Next year, i will promise myself to go clubbing for birthday! Clubbing or pubbing! I dont try to spite my dad..but this time, Im damn determined to do it! F!
LOVE n GOD BLESS!!!
(will elaborate more on my JB trip next time...and show some pics soon!)
Saturday, October 29, 2005
When all else fails...use ur home phone n whiff out ur old phonebook!
IM SOOOO SORRY GUYS!!! IMM SSOOOOO SORRY!
I swear Iw asnt clubbing or drinking or indulging in anythingelse! I only have one reason for this!...My handphone is dead.... :(
I feel soo bad for those who love me and call me to wish me happy birthday or sms me to wish me..yet cant get me. Im not being stuck up and I do appreciate it k. Im REALLY SORRY! I really wsh I cud receive ur call coz they mean alot to me. :(
At the same time..I cant give u the numebr of where I am now.. coz its not convenient online..if u want, find me on msn k? :( Really soo sorry... To my bros n sistas...
Speaking of wishes...am very happy that one of my long uncontacted bros smsed me. : heart-warming. i was a walking smiling smsing idiot at the Outram NEL for a few mins...
Its times like these that I thank God for all of you. Simply coz ur here. in fact, tell me ur birthday and I'll say it was a very special day...coz u were born. MUAHZ (inspiration from jeremy's mum)
LOVE YOU GUYS!
I swear Iw asnt clubbing or drinking or indulging in anythingelse! I only have one reason for this!...My handphone is dead.... :(
I feel soo bad for those who love me and call me to wish me happy birthday or sms me to wish me..yet cant get me. Im not being stuck up and I do appreciate it k. Im REALLY SORRY! I really wsh I cud receive ur call coz they mean alot to me. :(
At the same time..I cant give u the numebr of where I am now.. coz its not convenient online..if u want, find me on msn k? :( Really soo sorry... To my bros n sistas...
Speaking of wishes...am very happy that one of my long uncontacted bros smsed me. : heart-warming. i was a walking smiling smsing idiot at the Outram NEL for a few mins...
Its times like these that I thank God for all of you. Simply coz ur here. in fact, tell me ur birthday and I'll say it was a very special day...coz u were born. MUAHZ (inspiration from jeremy's mum)
LOVE YOU GUYS!
Friday, October 28, 2005
:)
At my aunts place now. Timecheck: 10.46pm
Hurrah! My favourite comics has just distributedits next book! Its so rare than not alot of pple have heard of it. The World of Kai! Takes abt a boy who grew up in the red light district and grew up tinkering w a piano. Because of this, he had an amazing talent w the piano. Somehow, he gets discovered by a de-funked world renowned pianist. The diff between other pianists and this kid is that, he plays a piecein his own way. Much like how a conductor changes the tone, flow or speed etc of a piece of music according to his interpretation.
In this kids hands, any piece he plays, will express the innocent vibrancy or liveliness of the place he grew up in. Not hte red light district..but the forest where he 1st discovered his piano. The piano he played n tinkered w since he was a toddler...whether he knew how to playt he piano or not.
I know Im not good at descriptions...wudnt be a gd film critic either but..if you want, I'll lendit to you. :)
Another thign worth mentioning today, was the "entertainment" my colleagues and I had during lunch. We walked to raffles shopping centre for lunch and saw a horde of ppleholding red n white umbrellas...taking a closer look, the design ont he umbrellas say, "Kotex" and taking an EVEN closer look, allthose holding the umbrellas were...guys! Gd looking ones! Hahaha Its a hilarious yet very brilliant idea!!!
The guys, carry umbrellas on a super hot day, trying to get girls or women to go to their Kotex Launch for a new image..I think. new packaging, new image..etc. the guys were normal clea white shirts n jeans n umbrellas in hand, coax girls or ladies to go over tot he Coffee Club (where the launch or bash is held) to do a free pedicure or manicure etc. The guys literally shelter the girls tot he coffee club! BRILLIANT! Getting cute guys to get women and to attract attention, get the guys to hold umbrellas that stand out! Perfect for the hot sun and yet..makes women feel "royal" when they personally escort them to the coffeee club! BRILLIANT I SAY!
The best laugh I got was when one oft he guys was someone I knew! Wahahahah He's from SP!
Poly students, young, sporty, tan, etc hahahah WAT BRILLIANCE AGAIN!!! Wahahahahahha
Im highly amused n impressed ahahahha Good work Kotex! You deserve a round of applause for that idea! it will get pple talking man! hahahahahha
LOVE
LOVE
Hurrah! My favourite comics has just distributedits next book! Its so rare than not alot of pple have heard of it. The World of Kai! Takes abt a boy who grew up in the red light district and grew up tinkering w a piano. Because of this, he had an amazing talent w the piano. Somehow, he gets discovered by a de-funked world renowned pianist. The diff between other pianists and this kid is that, he plays a piecein his own way. Much like how a conductor changes the tone, flow or speed etc of a piece of music according to his interpretation.
In this kids hands, any piece he plays, will express the innocent vibrancy or liveliness of the place he grew up in. Not hte red light district..but the forest where he 1st discovered his piano. The piano he played n tinkered w since he was a toddler...whether he knew how to playt he piano or not.
I know Im not good at descriptions...wudnt be a gd film critic either but..if you want, I'll lendit to you. :)
Another thign worth mentioning today, was the "entertainment" my colleagues and I had during lunch. We walked to raffles shopping centre for lunch and saw a horde of ppleholding red n white umbrellas...taking a closer look, the design ont he umbrellas say, "Kotex" and taking an EVEN closer look, allthose holding the umbrellas were...guys! Gd looking ones! Hahaha Its a hilarious yet very brilliant idea!!!
The guys, carry umbrellas on a super hot day, trying to get girls or women to go to their Kotex Launch for a new image..I think. new packaging, new image..etc. the guys were normal clea white shirts n jeans n umbrellas in hand, coax girls or ladies to go over tot he Coffee Club (where the launch or bash is held) to do a free pedicure or manicure etc. The guys literally shelter the girls tot he coffee club! BRILLIANT! Getting cute guys to get women and to attract attention, get the guys to hold umbrellas that stand out! Perfect for the hot sun and yet..makes women feel "royal" when they personally escort them to the coffeee club! BRILLIANT I SAY!
The best laugh I got was when one oft he guys was someone I knew! Wahahahah He's from SP!
Poly students, young, sporty, tan, etc hahahah WAT BRILLIANCE AGAIN!!! Wahahahahahha
Im highly amused n impressed ahahahha Good work Kotex! You deserve a round of applause for that idea! it will get pple talking man! hahahahahha
LOVE
LOVE
Thursday, October 27, 2005
You got me God..you really got me this time...
Rain rain rain! The moment i left my aunts place, it rained...the moment I got out of braddell MRT, I knew Id never reach home by 11. In fact, if I was patient enough, Id have waited until 12 n probably still be forced to be there. Yes!!! Goad has tested my patience! ONly..Iw asnt sure what he wanted me to do to pass this test...
The 1st few pple I called, lived just by the MRT. was tempted to borrow an umbrella but...none of them answered. One of which is perpetually unavailable that I got fed up and smsed, "If your hp does work, call me"... The other...well...lets just sayt hat Im terribly used to all this.. :/ Which is why I decided to give up and sit at braddell Mac til the sky quits crying...shud have known it wudnt stop so fast. Timecheck: 11.40pm n the rain is still going strong!
Gave up waiting, I walked over to a spot nearer to home. Literally, "soo near yet soo far" Me being me, am a lazy bum. I dont wanna get wet coz Id just taken a shower rght before leaving my aunts place n I wasnt about to get my newly washed hair wet w rain...So i waited on...until 11.30pm! Note: I got to braddell at around 10.30pm
Tried callng my same frens again..but to no avail. I admit I was being stubborner than a mule and insisted not to call my dad. I refuse to have my dad bring the umbrella down. I refuse even to ask my neighbour if he could bring an umbrella down but given these 3 options, Id rather the neighbour...As for my sis, she's at my aunts place..int eh luxury of seclusion n comfortable distance away from my dad...DRAT!
But no worries, here I am...wet hair n all, abit irritated yet abit of laughter that God would test me in such a way...or maybe it was meant to be a joke. Haiz...watever it is...you got me God! You really got me! I have given up on stubborness n walked int he rain!
But I am damn sian man.....really damn sian...
love
The 1st few pple I called, lived just by the MRT. was tempted to borrow an umbrella but...none of them answered. One of which is perpetually unavailable that I got fed up and smsed, "If your hp does work, call me"... The other...well...lets just sayt hat Im terribly used to all this.. :/ Which is why I decided to give up and sit at braddell Mac til the sky quits crying...shud have known it wudnt stop so fast. Timecheck: 11.40pm n the rain is still going strong!
Gave up waiting, I walked over to a spot nearer to home. Literally, "soo near yet soo far" Me being me, am a lazy bum. I dont wanna get wet coz Id just taken a shower rght before leaving my aunts place n I wasnt about to get my newly washed hair wet w rain...So i waited on...until 11.30pm! Note: I got to braddell at around 10.30pm
Tried callng my same frens again..but to no avail. I admit I was being stubborner than a mule and insisted not to call my dad. I refuse to have my dad bring the umbrella down. I refuse even to ask my neighbour if he could bring an umbrella down but given these 3 options, Id rather the neighbour...As for my sis, she's at my aunts place..int eh luxury of seclusion n comfortable distance away from my dad...DRAT!
But no worries, here I am...wet hair n all, abit irritated yet abit of laughter that God would test me in such a way...or maybe it was meant to be a joke. Haiz...watever it is...you got me God! You really got me! I have given up on stubborness n walked int he rain!
But I am damn sian man.....really damn sian...
love
the more you think you know, the more you find out you dont know
I stood through a mini tutorial w my boss n colleagues. Its more like story telling session where my boss tells us abt what happened and how we can learn from it. we just call it, "tutorial".
heres something that really struck me. Its better to know that who you are, how you act and what ur capable of, then not. At least u know ur doing it and if needs be, you'll change.
Also...its bad to not know anything and be stupid...but worse to not know anything and be stupid...yet think that ur smart and know everything.
There are times when I thin I know something..only to find out...that Im wrong. But me having soo much conviction, actually said it out confidently...
This only leads me to wonder...exactly how much do I know? exactly how much or what Ive read or studied is still in my brain? Saddening...
Not to mention that Im not even confident of what Im capable of doing...exactly what can I do and cant? Can I dabble in art n come up w a piece that people would remark w awe? Can I write a piece of prose and have pple come back to me and comment that my story was riveting or thought provoking?
You know...funny thing is as I thnk abt allt his n type it down, I realize that I am trying to be a genius..and expect the 1st piece of art or prose wud instantly burst into a success...im sure not. :/
Yet I guess fear of failure is my flaw...Fear is giving up on something before trying...failure is giving up something when you dont succeed on ur 1st try.
Hmm...sudden brain wave...
fear of failure wud then mean:
you are scared to give up on something when you dont succeed on ur 1st try. So if thats the case...you shudnt be scared to give things another try right?
Hehehehe lame!
Well anyways..I am abit demoralized by the realization that I am ...not ready for the working world. Because I only posess the characters that will result in me being "swallowed up" by other people. Yet...there is no tutorial that can guarantee that I wont be right? So do I plunge intot he deep end and try "like hell" to float? I cud end up like some of my frens who have been scared to death byt he working culture that their feet are weary even fromt he thought of stepping into the working world.
I dont know myself...that I know for sure (pure irony)...
Last but not least...to lightent eh mood :) heres the new me!
Note: this is how short my hair is.
LOVE
heres something that really struck me. Its better to know that who you are, how you act and what ur capable of, then not. At least u know ur doing it and if needs be, you'll change.
Also...its bad to not know anything and be stupid...but worse to not know anything and be stupid...yet think that ur smart and know everything.
There are times when I thin I know something..only to find out...that Im wrong. But me having soo much conviction, actually said it out confidently...
This only leads me to wonder...exactly how much do I know? exactly how much or what Ive read or studied is still in my brain? Saddening...
Not to mention that Im not even confident of what Im capable of doing...exactly what can I do and cant? Can I dabble in art n come up w a piece that people would remark w awe? Can I write a piece of prose and have pple come back to me and comment that my story was riveting or thought provoking?
You know...funny thing is as I thnk abt allt his n type it down, I realize that I am trying to be a genius..and expect the 1st piece of art or prose wud instantly burst into a success...im sure not. :/
Yet I guess fear of failure is my flaw...Fear is giving up on something before trying...failure is giving up something when you dont succeed on ur 1st try.
Hmm...sudden brain wave...
fear of failure wud then mean:
you are scared to give up on something when you dont succeed on ur 1st try. So if thats the case...you shudnt be scared to give things another try right?
Hehehehe lame!
Well anyways..I am abit demoralized by the realization that I am ...not ready for the working world. Because I only posess the characters that will result in me being "swallowed up" by other people. Yet...there is no tutorial that can guarantee that I wont be right? So do I plunge intot he deep end and try "like hell" to float? I cud end up like some of my frens who have been scared to death byt he working culture that their feet are weary even fromt he thought of stepping into the working world.
I dont know myself...that I know for sure (pure irony)...
Last but not least...to lightent eh mood :) heres the new me!
Note: this is how short my hair is.
LOVE
Wednesday, October 26, 2005
Hold ur breathe...you might just lose it...
Thats what my bro told me when he told me to see an art exhibition that skirted the street outside Borders. In case Im mistaken, Im refering to the Borders at orchard. The simple art exhibition stretches allt he way to Far East Shopping Centre and regardless of how little frills it has, the photos are an absolute wonder!
Heres an eg:
Alot more that cud prove to you that you have never travelled...The jist of all these pics? That the Earth IS Art...dont ask about what art is..how something can be art...that you dont understand art...the Earth IS Art. Sorta makes you feel abit guilty that you can be going to museums to see man-made art to be part of the cultured gang (serious stereotype..apologies) when ally ou need to do is open your eyes...art is around..int eh sky..every wisppy cloud..is like God's art..made from his own invisible brush.
Those of you who wanna see more..
http://www.yannarthusbertrand.com/yann2/index.php
Received a call from my mum before she n my aunt boarded teh plane. She was reminding me abt the plants,t he clothes, the food etc etc n int eh very end..a very rare " I love you" it hits me hard if I imagine that this wud be the last I hear her voice...God..please atek care of them...
As for my aunt...she's abit moody coz of her disease..has to take anti-depressant..she's on a respiratory thingy n is often in bed. My grandparents sit by her bed often to talk to ehr n cheer her up. My usually quirky grnadpa massages her feet! Enduring but often heart-wrenching.... :/
Godtake care of them all please...let them be safe n healthy n happy.
LOVE
Heres an eg:
Alot more that cud prove to you that you have never travelled...The jist of all these pics? That the Earth IS Art...dont ask about what art is..how something can be art...that you dont understand art...the Earth IS Art. Sorta makes you feel abit guilty that you can be going to museums to see man-made art to be part of the cultured gang (serious stereotype..apologies) when ally ou need to do is open your eyes...art is around..int eh sky..every wisppy cloud..is like God's art..made from his own invisible brush.
Those of you who wanna see more..
http://www.yannarthusbertrand.com/yann2/index.php
Received a call from my mum before she n my aunt boarded teh plane. She was reminding me abt the plants,t he clothes, the food etc etc n int eh very end..a very rare " I love you" it hits me hard if I imagine that this wud be the last I hear her voice...God..please atek care of them...
As for my aunt...she's abit moody coz of her disease..has to take anti-depressant..she's on a respiratory thingy n is often in bed. My grandparents sit by her bed often to talk to ehr n cheer her up. My usually quirky grnadpa massages her feet! Enduring but often heart-wrenching.... :/
Godtake care of them all please...let them be safe n healthy n happy.
LOVE
:)
Im better now! Was sick yesterday coz of sinus... :/
Got a few things I wanna talk abt today and I justr ealize that im being hugely formal with this! Hmmm Maybe coz Im determined not to forget to mention any of them. Might consider using bullet point.... BLLEECCHHH scratch that thought. here goes...
My aunt n mum are going to New Zealand. Place where the Kiwis not only grow on trees ( think) but they also roam n feed n reproduce...you get what I mean... Me being slightly paranoid...I hope n pray that they will come home safely...theres just sooo much happening int he world that ...its scary to think that God cud just be on his way to say Hi Again! or he might decide to take my mum n aunt away. maybe its the time of the month, or wat..but thinking abt the possibilities can make me abit wobbly int eh knees... Help me pray for them please...
another thing! had a birthday celebration today :P Lunch celebration heheh heres wats on the invitation card ...
Got a few things I wanna talk abt today and I justr ealize that im being hugely formal with this! Hmmm Maybe coz Im determined not to forget to mention any of them. Might consider using bullet point.... BLLEECCHHH scratch that thought. here goes...
My aunt n mum are going to New Zealand. Place where the Kiwis not only grow on trees ( think) but they also roam n feed n reproduce...you get what I mean... Me being slightly paranoid...I hope n pray that they will come home safely...theres just sooo much happening int he world that ...its scary to think that God cud just be on his way to say Hi Again! or he might decide to take my mum n aunt away. maybe its the time of the month, or wat..but thinking abt the possibilities can make me abit wobbly int eh knees... Help me pray for them please...
another thing! had a birthday celebration today :P Lunch celebration heheh heres wats on the invitation card ...
The Ba Gua Girls Club
cordially invite
Bim, Turtle, Herbie, Avid-Beach & Bai-Kar-Lian
to
cordially invite
Bim, Turtle, Herbie, Avid-Beach & Bai-Kar-Lian
to
A Bird-day Celebration for the Turtle
Wednesday, 26 October 2005
12pm
Beijing La Mian Kitchen
Colours by the Bay, Esplanade Mall
#01-13B
Dress Code: Any attire that resembles a turtle/tortoise/terrapin or anything quirky
~ Other animals will be denied entry ~
No RSVP allowed, attendance is compulsory…
Soo...the font is abit different from the real one actually hehehe but I like it alot! Im actually very touched by this gesture much as Im now refered to as ...turtle..or...ter tow (cantonese cum english accent) :) smiling from cheek to cheek!
Lastly... a news that Im hoping will come true...I got a call from my ex lecturer who asked me if I was interested to take up a short stint in assisting a director from mediacorp... :D I agreed to it even wthout asking abt the price n the time slots..etc...Judging from the job scope...Im in for hours of hell man!!! late ngihts n early mornings!!! But HELL!!! IM GAME!!! I am abit worried about whether Im capable enough to take on the role though... God help me to be able to fill in the big shoes that you so graciously have decided to grant me...
Thinking abt this amazing job offer, one thign came to mind...the prayer I made in my frens church that made me tear...I said to God in the quietest of voices (in my heart) That if I weer to walk the wrong way...if He were to give me a crossroad n I ahev taken the wrong path, that he would take me away from that route and put me in the right direction. I said that if it hurts to leave that route, let it be but may He help me to recover from my wrong decisions....like how He has made me recover from my ex. I know some of you may be saying that choosing to be in a relationship cant be a wrong decision after all he is a good guy...but apparently (for obvious reasons) God would not allow me to be w him. So be it...God will carry me through...
My boss was telling me that during the aikido class I missed yesterday, 2 new indian guys came in... :/ Yes all my colleagues are convinced that Id marry an Indian and my mother-in-law will never complain of my table manners (ie: w chopsticks n forks n spoons) coz she'd most prob be eating w her hands... hey man! evene ating w hands has an art to it yah! hahahaha I speak for my fellow indian frens! Thumbi, thangichi, ah kahs n ah nehs (apologies for the spellings)
other than all this...I cant wait for a JB trip!!! Sunday! :P
Also...last but not least..those of you who are looking for me this week n the next...I'll be living at my aunts place...telok blangah. So Im sorry...no sudden breakfasts and dinners from my neighbours or frens living nearby. :)
Love you guys loads! Stay healthy and slim! :P
LOVE
Tuesday, October 25, 2005
....flu flu go away...dont come back ever again
If I didnt correct my typing, You would see a whole block of letters w no meaning watsoever. Im terribly blur n red eyed n runny nosed. Yes its one of those days where I fall sick nn look like shit. Funny thing abt it is that..I get sick very rarely. But when I do, Its very draaining. DRAT
Im so tempted to go home but Im telling myself that I sudnt coz theres stuff to do.
Anyway Im trying my dbsolute best tpkeep awake.....
ning
Im so tempted to go home but Im telling myself that I sudnt coz theres stuff to do.
Anyway Im trying my dbsolute best tpkeep awake.....
ning
Monday, October 24, 2005
Forgive me for I have sinned :/ (RA rated)
My sin was to overindulge in something that I had vowed never to overindulge hehehe...food
Just today, my colleagues tried to tempt me w a plate of hokkien mee. I confidently told themt hat I wasnt tempted by food like that. In fact..I now know what Im tempted by! Oysters! Sashimi! Cheese! Egg! Etc etc etc Waaahhhhh
Had a moret han full dinner w my auntie n her fren at the Bar & Billard Room at...raffles hotel thats right! Buffet! I approached the food with only one strategy...to try abit of everything!
The different cheese, cakes, stews, salads, ice cream. yadayadayada...byt he time I was done, I cudnt yawn...simple as that...yawning became a prob. I had to stifle my yawns
Wat tipped it all off was a car ride home! A ride that was a nightmare coz I was trying to desperately to hold my stomacache... :( I know now that..if we cud throw everything int he buffet line, into a pot n stick a blender into it...we cud produce the most effective Laxative known to mankind!!! How do I know? ...I hit the loo the moment I got home!
Int he car, my stomach had its own mini World War 3..onyl waiting till I sat down on the toilet seat and gave the green light to "bomb"....crudely put....
So now...with legs half numb n a higher threshold for pain, I know know what it feels like to have a bloody painful monthly cramp...quite honestly..the pain is soo bad that you cant stand straight n you can actually go on ur tiptoes! somethign like a guy being kciked int he crotch? ( I wudnt really know the extent)
But all in all, I can only say one thing! Enjopy the process (of eating) and bear the consequences (stabbing pains n long toilet sessions)
Shall end here...feel a puke coming on...or maybe a possible round 2 w the toilet seat...
LOVE
Just today, my colleagues tried to tempt me w a plate of hokkien mee. I confidently told themt hat I wasnt tempted by food like that. In fact..I now know what Im tempted by! Oysters! Sashimi! Cheese! Egg! Etc etc etc Waaahhhhh
Had a moret han full dinner w my auntie n her fren at the Bar & Billard Room at...raffles hotel thats right! Buffet! I approached the food with only one strategy...to try abit of everything!
The different cheese, cakes, stews, salads, ice cream. yadayadayada...byt he time I was done, I cudnt yawn...simple as that...yawning became a prob. I had to stifle my yawns
Wat tipped it all off was a car ride home! A ride that was a nightmare coz I was trying to desperately to hold my stomacache... :( I know now that..if we cud throw everything int he buffet line, into a pot n stick a blender into it...we cud produce the most effective Laxative known to mankind!!! How do I know? ...I hit the loo the moment I got home!
Int he car, my stomach had its own mini World War 3..onyl waiting till I sat down on the toilet seat and gave the green light to "bomb"....crudely put....
So now...with legs half numb n a higher threshold for pain, I know know what it feels like to have a bloody painful monthly cramp...quite honestly..the pain is soo bad that you cant stand straight n you can actually go on ur tiptoes! somethign like a guy being kciked int he crotch? ( I wudnt really know the extent)
But all in all, I can only say one thing! Enjopy the process (of eating) and bear the consequences (stabbing pains n long toilet sessions)
Shall end here...feel a puke coming on...or maybe a possible round 2 w the toilet seat...
LOVE
....manamanah
nothing in particular to write actually...just writing because I feel like I need to. Which is funny...coz nobody needs to write in a blog...theres no regulation that says we have to write it every week or day...we're just driven by our own need to express ourselves. So am I writing beause I need to write something...or coz I need to say something?...
forgot to tell you guys abt this confusing question I was discussing w a bro of mine. I asked him...who do u pray to? Lord Jesus Christ? Holy Spirit? God the Father? Insome churches, they pray to Jesus...afterall he's the one who saved us from our sins. Yet Jesus died to save us and he provided us w a direct communicaton path to God. So shudnt we be talking to God? But then, isnt Jesus God as well? How abt the Holy Spirit?
one things for sure...I now that we shudnt be praying to Virgin Mary or any of the Saints or Apostles..etc...coz they are not God. To pray to them (in my opinion) wud be like praying to the wrong thing...instead of God..ie: Idol. Btw, Idol doesnt only mean other Gods like Buddha, Vishnu..etc It basically means anything that we have more regard for...compared to God. Like money, studies, gf/bf, loved ones...all of these are idols coz we regard them as more impt than God. Sad to say...I am guilty of it. :/
Hope today goes smoothly...
LOVE
forgot to tell you guys abt this confusing question I was discussing w a bro of mine. I asked him...who do u pray to? Lord Jesus Christ? Holy Spirit? God the Father? Insome churches, they pray to Jesus...afterall he's the one who saved us from our sins. Yet Jesus died to save us and he provided us w a direct communicaton path to God. So shudnt we be talking to God? But then, isnt Jesus God as well? How abt the Holy Spirit?
one things for sure...I now that we shudnt be praying to Virgin Mary or any of the Saints or Apostles..etc...coz they are not God. To pray to them (in my opinion) wud be like praying to the wrong thing...instead of God..ie: Idol. Btw, Idol doesnt only mean other Gods like Buddha, Vishnu..etc It basically means anything that we have more regard for...compared to God. Like money, studies, gf/bf, loved ones...all of these are idols coz we regard them as more impt than God. Sad to say...I am guilty of it. :/
Hope today goes smoothly...
LOVE
Sunday, October 23, 2005
...
Went to new creation to see how its like today. Been keeping my ears alert abt how they preach the God's Word...I know its because of my sleeping late..that results in me being sleepy int eh day... After the sermon..I stayed int he hallf or a few extra seconds and started to pray... by the time I finished...I had 2 drops of tears hanging from my lashes...My bro might have been worried..but he didnt show it and I know he wudnt..coz he knew that such things shudnt be mentioned. Reason why I teared...was because I guess..its been such a long time that I hadnt really spoken to God and I owed him the explanation and the apologies and the renewal of faith...
My apologies to my bro who cudnt tahan my planning...I truly suck...
Anyway...much as life is good to me now..I know internally..life is abit messed up for me. Not abt love life okay..more abt working life...future..family life...I still need to figure out what I plan to do. Honestly...whoever that has come up to me and asked me what I really wanna do after SSO...will only be rewarded with a vague answer...Radio. But i know inside that much as I look to radio..Ive never really done anything abt it..not to mention my compereing. Purely my fault...and just thinking abt fixing that..is making my head spin...
I owe it to alot of pple who have faith in me man...soo many and I know that however I end up in years to come...has to my effort as well...
Thanks you guys..I'll try to work things out...
LOVE
My apologies to my bro who cudnt tahan my planning...I truly suck...
Anyway...much as life is good to me now..I know internally..life is abit messed up for me. Not abt love life okay..more abt working life...future..family life...I still need to figure out what I plan to do. Honestly...whoever that has come up to me and asked me what I really wanna do after SSO...will only be rewarded with a vague answer...Radio. But i know inside that much as I look to radio..Ive never really done anything abt it..not to mention my compereing. Purely my fault...and just thinking abt fixing that..is making my head spin...
I owe it to alot of pple who have faith in me man...soo many and I know that however I end up in years to come...has to my effort as well...
Thanks you guys..I'll try to work things out...
LOVE
Thursday, October 20, 2005
GONE! ALL GONE!!!
In one full swoop! The hair I had harnessed in 1n half years...was cast into a plastic bag n sent to the cancer foundation (that is the plan) Yes! I am now....hair-less ( as in less hair)
Im back to my tomboyish ways and I believe I'd be able to carry a cap better now hahaha
An instant sense of lightness as the hairdresser snipped of that whole bunch of hair..about..25cm worth? Yeah :) I can swing my hair abt without hurting anyone!
Wat Im wondering now..is whether I can tie my hair up for aikido! Oh well...where theres a will, theres a way.
Anyway...things have been good for me. Went for the compere n sparc camp and Im sooooo glad thatt he comperes n sparcs gelled together!! :) BIG HURRAH to clarisse n gang!!! You guys deserve the biggest hugs and a tub of ice-cream!!! :P Im soo proud of you guys! The SPARC pple also!! :D As for our compere juniors...sad to say...they dun look like they can talk..not to mention..have the confidence...BUT they will in due time..maybe some of them just dont look the part but actually have it!
Went for the last ngiht..the big performance n was soooo glad that Adam turned up! it was justt he both of us..out fot he comperes... sad really....but...glad it was Adam...It feels great to have one of your bestest best bros with you...its great to be able to catch up w him. :) Turns out..after allt hat screaming and cheering..a headache developed and I was feeling pukey. Its one of those headaches like someone is playing drums on ur head! Took Panadol n it got worse! Good thing I had one of my bros n Adam to walk me to teh station..coz it wud have been a very pathetic n slow walk alone. Already..I am missing all my bros...sad thing is that...the other bestest best bro is non-existent anymore...sad...Maybe in years to come...when Ive finally found a way...I will be able to turn back n talk to this bestest best bro of mine n we cud reminisce on the stuff we did together...like old frens :) But the time isnt here yet.
As I walked intot he station... Adam told me to take care...he didnt elaborate but I know what he means... :) I will bro. I will take care of myself :)
Last night..I wondered whether to call up my ex and talk...but I realized...that we dont have much to talk about. Much as I want to get my bestest best bro back...I dont have the guts or the strength to talk to him and say, "lets be frens again" coz...by doing that, Im letting myself back into the same dark room Ive kept locked up inside...I'll have to dig through soo many memories n remember some..just to find those that I wud need to let me be frens w him again...in short...Im hurting myself again. Soo Im sorry BBB...you know Im not the kind who dismisses or avoids frens...esp those I cherish alot...but I cant do it now.
Soo :) Here I am...1n half years cut off from me, time to start afresh! Chase my dreams n be bold! like the captain from Space ship enterprise says..to infinity and beyond!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Wahahahaha
LOVE
Im back to my tomboyish ways and I believe I'd be able to carry a cap better now hahaha
An instant sense of lightness as the hairdresser snipped of that whole bunch of hair..about..25cm worth? Yeah :) I can swing my hair abt without hurting anyone!
Wat Im wondering now..is whether I can tie my hair up for aikido! Oh well...where theres a will, theres a way.
Anyway...things have been good for me. Went for the compere n sparc camp and Im sooooo glad thatt he comperes n sparcs gelled together!! :) BIG HURRAH to clarisse n gang!!! You guys deserve the biggest hugs and a tub of ice-cream!!! :P Im soo proud of you guys! The SPARC pple also!! :D As for our compere juniors...sad to say...they dun look like they can talk..not to mention..have the confidence...BUT they will in due time..maybe some of them just dont look the part but actually have it!
Went for the last ngiht..the big performance n was soooo glad that Adam turned up! it was justt he both of us..out fot he comperes... sad really....but...glad it was Adam...It feels great to have one of your bestest best bros with you...its great to be able to catch up w him. :) Turns out..after allt hat screaming and cheering..a headache developed and I was feeling pukey. Its one of those headaches like someone is playing drums on ur head! Took Panadol n it got worse! Good thing I had one of my bros n Adam to walk me to teh station..coz it wud have been a very pathetic n slow walk alone. Already..I am missing all my bros...sad thing is that...the other bestest best bro is non-existent anymore...sad...Maybe in years to come...when Ive finally found a way...I will be able to turn back n talk to this bestest best bro of mine n we cud reminisce on the stuff we did together...like old frens :) But the time isnt here yet.
As I walked intot he station... Adam told me to take care...he didnt elaborate but I know what he means... :) I will bro. I will take care of myself :)
Last night..I wondered whether to call up my ex and talk...but I realized...that we dont have much to talk about. Much as I want to get my bestest best bro back...I dont have the guts or the strength to talk to him and say, "lets be frens again" coz...by doing that, Im letting myself back into the same dark room Ive kept locked up inside...I'll have to dig through soo many memories n remember some..just to find those that I wud need to let me be frens w him again...in short...Im hurting myself again. Soo Im sorry BBB...you know Im not the kind who dismisses or avoids frens...esp those I cherish alot...but I cant do it now.
Soo :) Here I am...1n half years cut off from me, time to start afresh! Chase my dreams n be bold! like the captain from Space ship enterprise says..to infinity and beyond!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Wahahahaha
LOVE
Monday, October 17, 2005
Once a compere, always a compere
Went back to the comperes camp ttoday n it felt soo much like the 1st day I joined comperes. I wished I cud go back in time :P Actually saw a junior who reminds me of my ex but..thats besides the case.
Was recalling the best event I did and the worst... I only wish I cud show them my pics or videos... :( I really wish i cud..maybe it wud give them a better picture of exactly how much fun we had in our time! its soo reat to be witht eh rest of teh comperes...
Of all I recalled, I told them abt my 2 bestest best bros..the 2 bros I wud never forget...coz I adored them, sayang them like mad man! One fo which is my ex. I do still miss him but as I spoke abt these 2 bros and the past events we did....I missed the brotherhood...I miss it soo much.
I miss being able to joke with them...I miss the event we did together...damn..
Given a chance to change things...I sorta wished things didnt happent his way. I sorta regret ever getting w my ex..coz it spoiled the comradarie btwn him n I. I lost wat I valued soo much..having bros that I cud really talk to...now...nothing can be said at all...
I guess I can only be happy that I had such a good bro. My bestest best bros...
love
Was recalling the best event I did and the worst... I only wish I cud show them my pics or videos... :( I really wish i cud..maybe it wud give them a better picture of exactly how much fun we had in our time! its soo reat to be witht eh rest of teh comperes...
Of all I recalled, I told them abt my 2 bestest best bros..the 2 bros I wud never forget...coz I adored them, sayang them like mad man! One fo which is my ex. I do still miss him but as I spoke abt these 2 bros and the past events we did....I missed the brotherhood...I miss it soo much.
I miss being able to joke with them...I miss the event we did together...damn..
Given a chance to change things...I sorta wished things didnt happent his way. I sorta regret ever getting w my ex..coz it spoiled the comradarie btwn him n I. I lost wat I valued soo much..having bros that I cud really talk to...now...nothing can be said at all...
I guess I can only be happy that I had such a good bro. My bestest best bros...
love
Sunday, October 16, 2005
Jihad..Quran..Bible..Judaism...we all link?
Its been a long while since I last saw the back cat downstairs my place. :( really hope she's okay man. Its quite rare that I get soo attached to a cat cos Im a dog person!
Anyway...lets get controversial!
Id firstly like to say...
Disclaimer: This is not meant to discriminate other races or religions. If there are any misunderstandings, I welcome the truth and differing views!
Jihad...
The media's "holy war"... The past religious terrorist attacks have been mostly attributed to muslims and it leads me to wonder exactly wat Jihad means...
JIhad has 2 types (according to Wikipedia) One is an internal battle w ur soul...(more like temptations like lust, greed etc etc etc) The other is the external type..to attain ur justice n freedom from an oppressor, for the cause of God...when u have no other choice
My belief is that Islam branched out from the Bible. prophet Muhammed, Abraham...allt hese are charcters in The bible. The difference between the Bible and the Quran is this:
1) The original text was translated or interpreted in a different way
2) Bible believes that our Saviour has already come. Lord Jesus Christ. Quran believes that the Saviour is yet to come, and so holds fast to the commandments of the bible and does not regard the new Testament. Basically..they go strictly by the Old testament.
http://www.submission.org/god-bible.html
I was reading this website...abt the difference between certain beliefs from the bible n the Quran and depending on how you look at it..they both actually believe in the same thing. The prob w interpretating the bible n Quran this way is that you pick out certain verses without looking at the context of that verse. ie: you take it the wrong way
Eg: Psalm 13.1 : How long will you forget me oh Lord? and from the Quran He said, "The knowledge thereof is with my Lord in a record. My Lord never errs, nor does He forget. "
[20:52] For a christian, we believe that God doesnt forget us. He knows everything in this world..down to the last atom n how it works...he doesnt forget...In fact if you look at the bible, the same phrase continues saying, "how long will thou hide thy face from me?" God didnt forget! He chose not to answer or hide from us. Abit like how we chose to hide from Him. God calls for us to come back to Him but we dont answer..onyl to find that..when we do want to go back..God has stopped calling for us. In this case, the writer of this website..seems to believe that Christianity believes in a God who can forget about us. He doesnt forget about us. When we call hard enough n with faith, with no worldly intentions n fervently...he will answer.
Some of the arguments were also made using the wrong phrases. And if you really read it, you'll see that whatever he's used to justify that the Bible disagrees with the Quran..is cancelled off by the verses he's used to justify that the Bible does agree with the Quran. The thing is..one can not justify how a God is like just by pin pointing one verse...
"Do men think that they will be left alone on saying we believe and they will not be tested? But, we did test those before them and God will certainly know those who are true from those who are false." Qur'an 29:1
It is said that the Quran disagrees with the Bible because one of the verses goes against the verse above...
"We conclude that a man is justified by faith without the deeds of the law." Roman 3:28
By my own interpretation...what the writer implies is that in Quran, even believers are tested to see if they truly believe in Allah (as they call him) The writer wud then mean that in teh Bible, it says that christians are not tested? hmm Job was tested by Satan upon God's approval..his fortune n family were all taken from him... Of course..this is the Old testament...In the new testament, Jesus Christ was tested (in the wilderness), Simon Peter was tested ( as he walked on the water surface towards God) Judas was definitely tested, Paul...etc In fact...every trial n tribulation we come across is given by God. A test, a trial, a temptation to even the most faithful of man.
If that were not the case...would Jesus have to teach those who believeed n listened to him to pray to God in a certain way? Matt6: 9-13..Our father in heaven, ...lead us not into temptation but deliever us from evil....
Moving on...as for Jihad...It leads me to wonder if some of the muslims got tha wrong impression abt Jihad. In fact according to the same website (which might be written by a muslim)...the greater meaning of Jihad is to achieve an internal path to righteousness. You practice fighting against ur own temptations. Islam does not condone War..it is showered with words or 'peace, love etc. If thats teh case, war can never be the meaning of jihad (according tot eh writer) Int eh Quran, it says to fight for the cause of God..not to fight using Gods name. There is a HUGE difference.
Likewise fro christianity...love they enemy as thyself. If someone were to slap you on the right cheek, turn to him the other. Book of Matthews
I blame the media as well for the careless use of the word, Jihad..but it is also the terrorists fault who take Jihad as " to kill all unbelievers" No doubt seom of them have a strong belief in their God...but we all believe something fromt he way we perceive it. Take the story abt the 5 blind men and the elephant. Story goes that the 5 blind men were trying to find out whatt he animal in front of them was. each of them felt a part of the animal and all of them had a diff theory abt it. One said it was thick and rough (the elephant's feet) the other said it was flat and thin like a fan (elephant's ear) etc etc...
Two key points when it comes to Jihad (externally)
- When there is oppression
- When it is for the cause of God not the cause of tyranny
HOnestly....I wished I was born in the era where Jesus Christ was still alive and telling people abt God and showing miracles...maybe then it wud be easier to believe...not to mention have him there to teach me what I find confusing or vague...but ..every era has its difficulties..at that era, believers wud have been prone to persecution.
After all this talk..I know alot you have differing views..Please tell me abt it...esp if ur muslim or even jewish! I know we all link! I just wanna know how. :)
God, help me to understand you...
LOVE
Anyway...lets get controversial!
Id firstly like to say...
Disclaimer: This is not meant to discriminate other races or religions. If there are any misunderstandings, I welcome the truth and differing views!
Jihad...
The media's "holy war"... The past religious terrorist attacks have been mostly attributed to muslims and it leads me to wonder exactly wat Jihad means...
JIhad has 2 types (according to Wikipedia) One is an internal battle w ur soul...(more like temptations like lust, greed etc etc etc) The other is the external type..to attain ur justice n freedom from an oppressor, for the cause of God...when u have no other choice
My belief is that Islam branched out from the Bible. prophet Muhammed, Abraham...allt hese are charcters in The bible. The difference between the Bible and the Quran is this:
1) The original text was translated or interpreted in a different way
2) Bible believes that our Saviour has already come. Lord Jesus Christ. Quran believes that the Saviour is yet to come, and so holds fast to the commandments of the bible and does not regard the new Testament. Basically..they go strictly by the Old testament.
http://www.submission.org/god-bible.html
I was reading this website...abt the difference between certain beliefs from the bible n the Quran and depending on how you look at it..they both actually believe in the same thing. The prob w interpretating the bible n Quran this way is that you pick out certain verses without looking at the context of that verse. ie: you take it the wrong way
Eg: Psalm 13.1 : How long will you forget me oh Lord? and from the Quran He said, "The knowledge thereof is with my Lord in a record. My Lord never errs, nor does He forget. "
[20:52] For a christian, we believe that God doesnt forget us. He knows everything in this world..down to the last atom n how it works...he doesnt forget...In fact if you look at the bible, the same phrase continues saying, "how long will thou hide thy face from me?" God didnt forget! He chose not to answer or hide from us. Abit like how we chose to hide from Him. God calls for us to come back to Him but we dont answer..onyl to find that..when we do want to go back..God has stopped calling for us. In this case, the writer of this website..seems to believe that Christianity believes in a God who can forget about us. He doesnt forget about us. When we call hard enough n with faith, with no worldly intentions n fervently...he will answer.
Some of the arguments were also made using the wrong phrases. And if you really read it, you'll see that whatever he's used to justify that the Bible disagrees with the Quran..is cancelled off by the verses he's used to justify that the Bible does agree with the Quran. The thing is..one can not justify how a God is like just by pin pointing one verse...
"Do men think that they will be left alone on saying we believe and they will not be tested? But, we did test those before them and God will certainly know those who are true from those who are false." Qur'an 29:1
It is said that the Quran disagrees with the Bible because one of the verses goes against the verse above...
"We conclude that a man is justified by faith without the deeds of the law." Roman 3:28
By my own interpretation...what the writer implies is that in Quran, even believers are tested to see if they truly believe in Allah (as they call him) The writer wud then mean that in teh Bible, it says that christians are not tested? hmm Job was tested by Satan upon God's approval..his fortune n family were all taken from him... Of course..this is the Old testament...In the new testament, Jesus Christ was tested (in the wilderness), Simon Peter was tested ( as he walked on the water surface towards God) Judas was definitely tested, Paul...etc In fact...every trial n tribulation we come across is given by God. A test, a trial, a temptation to even the most faithful of man.
If that were not the case...would Jesus have to teach those who believeed n listened to him to pray to God in a certain way? Matt6: 9-13..Our father in heaven, ...lead us not into temptation but deliever us from evil....
Moving on...as for Jihad...It leads me to wonder if some of the muslims got tha wrong impression abt Jihad. In fact according to the same website (which might be written by a muslim)...the greater meaning of Jihad is to achieve an internal path to righteousness. You practice fighting against ur own temptations. Islam does not condone War..it is showered with words or 'peace, love etc. If thats teh case, war can never be the meaning of jihad (according tot eh writer) Int eh Quran, it says to fight for the cause of God..not to fight using Gods name. There is a HUGE difference.
Likewise fro christianity...love they enemy as thyself. If someone were to slap you on the right cheek, turn to him the other. Book of Matthews
I blame the media as well for the careless use of the word, Jihad..but it is also the terrorists fault who take Jihad as " to kill all unbelievers" No doubt seom of them have a strong belief in their God...but we all believe something fromt he way we perceive it. Take the story abt the 5 blind men and the elephant. Story goes that the 5 blind men were trying to find out whatt he animal in front of them was. each of them felt a part of the animal and all of them had a diff theory abt it. One said it was thick and rough (the elephant's feet) the other said it was flat and thin like a fan (elephant's ear) etc etc...
Two key points when it comes to Jihad (externally)
- When there is oppression
- When it is for the cause of God not the cause of tyranny
HOnestly....I wished I was born in the era where Jesus Christ was still alive and telling people abt God and showing miracles...maybe then it wud be easier to believe...not to mention have him there to teach me what I find confusing or vague...but ..every era has its difficulties..at that era, believers wud have been prone to persecution.
After all this talk..I know alot you have differing views..Please tell me abt it...esp if ur muslim or even jewish! I know we all link! I just wanna know how. :)
God, help me to understand you...
LOVE
Saturday, October 15, 2005
Is it bad?
Had a fun time w one of my bros int he morning, playing basketball. I no I dont go full fledged running around, defence and stuff but as we played, we talked.
Few things ive learnt...
1) Sometimes the definition of a person being bad...is whether they dot he wrong thing att he wrong time..or the wrong thing at the right time.
2)Things are never what they seem...its an irony who I learnt this from...(not from this bro by teh way)
3) Nobody really understands us except ourselves. Even then..we might not understand ourselevs that well either.
Met another two of my frens for lunch and one of them is one of my closest sistas in poly...we shared alot man. I guess at these times..I miss poly life like hell. For the past few days Ive been fighting to NOT learn things hahahaha Ive been fighting to accept things as they are, yet me being a person who hates to be kept in the dark (some can say that Im Kaypo) It makes it een harder for me...to just see thigns as they are put forward to me. LIke how the moon only shows half of its face to us. Wats the other half like? Maybe only the other planets will know.
Maybe coz Ive been too judgemental? That pple wud rather I not know certaint hings...least I get angry or dissappointed with them? If thats the case...you wudnt know until you try right? But wud I really be someone who refrains from being ur fren coz u tell me of something that I wud PROBABLY not approev of? (note: probably)
Just wanna make it clear that while I dissapprove of my frens smoking...I frown upon it...Ive never once stopped being frens with any of them. Esp if ur my fren to start with. I will try to get u off it..but onyl coz Im ur fren.
So erally..try me..give me ur best shot....Ive got the worst in mind...
The last I philosophy of mine..is that you cant complain that nobody knows u...because you have to be the one who tells them who you are 1st. If you dont..you will never have anyone who knows you...att eh end of the day..you will float away as an enigma...
To my frens who have been uninhibited with me...I salute you because you are indeed a rarity and I vow to be ur trusted fren...In return..I give you all you wanna know as well. :) Keep your truthfulness because at the end of the day..you can garner the most help when you need it. And I will try my best to make sure you are never harmed or hurt. Because I love you guys loads.
love
Few things ive learnt...
1) Sometimes the definition of a person being bad...is whether they dot he wrong thing att he wrong time..or the wrong thing at the right time.
2)Things are never what they seem...its an irony who I learnt this from...(not from this bro by teh way)
3) Nobody really understands us except ourselves. Even then..we might not understand ourselevs that well either.
Met another two of my frens for lunch and one of them is one of my closest sistas in poly...we shared alot man. I guess at these times..I miss poly life like hell. For the past few days Ive been fighting to NOT learn things hahahaha Ive been fighting to accept things as they are, yet me being a person who hates to be kept in the dark (some can say that Im Kaypo) It makes it een harder for me...to just see thigns as they are put forward to me. LIke how the moon only shows half of its face to us. Wats the other half like? Maybe only the other planets will know.
Maybe coz Ive been too judgemental? That pple wud rather I not know certaint hings...least I get angry or dissappointed with them? If thats the case...you wudnt know until you try right? But wud I really be someone who refrains from being ur fren coz u tell me of something that I wud PROBABLY not approev of? (note: probably)
Just wanna make it clear that while I dissapprove of my frens smoking...I frown upon it...Ive never once stopped being frens with any of them. Esp if ur my fren to start with. I will try to get u off it..but onyl coz Im ur fren.
So erally..try me..give me ur best shot....Ive got the worst in mind...
The last I philosophy of mine..is that you cant complain that nobody knows u...because you have to be the one who tells them who you are 1st. If you dont..you will never have anyone who knows you...att eh end of the day..you will float away as an enigma...
To my frens who have been uninhibited with me...I salute you because you are indeed a rarity and I vow to be ur trusted fren...In return..I give you all you wanna know as well. :) Keep your truthfulness because at the end of the day..you can garner the most help when you need it. And I will try my best to make sure you are never harmed or hurt. Because I love you guys loads.
love
Thursday, October 13, 2005
Accept and you will feel less upset
They're right...
After talking to a fren for a long time today..I realized that...watever Ive felt uneasy abt..is actually simple human nature to some pple..it sitn wrong..in fact...its not that they're wrong..they're right at the right time...thats the most impt I guess... Although its obvious that not everyone can take that kind of lifestyle. :/
Anyway..Ive stopped searching...searching for the answer etc...
Obviously I'll feel as if Ive been kept int he dark and a little lied to...but I guess I wud have to be more alert myself to decipher what happens around me...
Watever it is...at least I know I have frens that matter to me and that wud never abuse my trust in them...if they do...we'll haev to see...coz I really dont knwo how Id act...soemthign I dont wanna see at all...
love
After talking to a fren for a long time today..I realized that...watever Ive felt uneasy abt..is actually simple human nature to some pple..it sitn wrong..in fact...its not that they're wrong..they're right at the right time...thats the most impt I guess... Although its obvious that not everyone can take that kind of lifestyle. :/
Anyway..Ive stopped searching...searching for the answer etc...
Obviously I'll feel as if Ive been kept int he dark and a little lied to...but I guess I wud have to be more alert myself to decipher what happens around me...
Watever it is...at least I know I have frens that matter to me and that wud never abuse my trust in them...if they do...we'll haev to see...coz I really dont knwo how Id act...soemthign I dont wanna see at all...
love
My flaw...
Soooo...spoke to my boss etc and I realized some of my flaws...
1) I procrastinate...
2) I am emotonal
I realize that Ive assumed that everyone thinks like me... that certain things that seem like common sense...just isnt common sense to other pple.
Like how I get upset when I find out that my bros are smoking...to me its just common sense that smoking is a "hobby" that will only kill you. Its not gonna give you any medical benefits, you're not gonna get smarter etc or more good looking..etc
Or that I expect my frens to be on time and serious when it needs be...yet how important I regard something...isnt always as important for them...
Its like..me being over enthusiastic, running a marathon and trying to push or pull everyone to run with me instead of walking. In the end...Im the one who's suffering n getting upset. What for? which brings me back to my "no use clapping with one hand" theory.
Soo lesson learnt? Stop caring? Nah!!! I'll still scold you bros who cant think straight hahha but I think at one point of time...Iw udnt even need to scold you coz you know...everytime you see me, you'd know :P MANIPULATION!!!
LOVE
1) I procrastinate...
2) I am emotonal
I realize that Ive assumed that everyone thinks like me... that certain things that seem like common sense...just isnt common sense to other pple.
Like how I get upset when I find out that my bros are smoking...to me its just common sense that smoking is a "hobby" that will only kill you. Its not gonna give you any medical benefits, you're not gonna get smarter etc or more good looking..etc
Or that I expect my frens to be on time and serious when it needs be...yet how important I regard something...isnt always as important for them...
Its like..me being over enthusiastic, running a marathon and trying to push or pull everyone to run with me instead of walking. In the end...Im the one who's suffering n getting upset. What for? which brings me back to my "no use clapping with one hand" theory.
Soo lesson learnt? Stop caring? Nah!!! I'll still scold you bros who cant think straight hahha but I think at one point of time...Iw udnt even need to scold you coz you know...everytime you see me, you'd know :P MANIPULATION!!!
LOVE
Wednesday, October 12, 2005
...
Feeling tad down... I feel like Imt he only one who's dedicated to comperes..who sees it not only as a club..but a place that I can fulfill my dreams...
Maybe coz I wasnt part of all the planning...made me see things that werent there.Or miss things that were.... Thinking of all this..sorta makes me feel like a fool...
I love comperes coz it gave me the frens I hold dear..because it gave me chances to go on stage and host n perform..it was the ground on which I my dreams grew. Yet I know that for some who had the same vigour n dreams for comperes, some of it died down...because of the politics? because of some other memebr's lack of committement?
Are my views soo different from every other sane person's? Am I a typical blood type B person? hahaha puts emotions 1st, overconfident int heir work....doesnt like interference? etc etc etc?
Or is it coz Im superficial..that I love to go up stage and show myself? Only to have a possible group of pple criticizing me and my skills or looks...
Ive lost my drive..for teh past few weeks...like...not toos ure what I wanna do... it totally sucks coz..its making me listless... At this point of time..I need to take a break and think abt or do somethign abt my life...
Till then..I might be writing lesser...
love
Maybe coz I wasnt part of all the planning...made me see things that werent there.Or miss things that were.... Thinking of all this..sorta makes me feel like a fool...
I love comperes coz it gave me the frens I hold dear..because it gave me chances to go on stage and host n perform..it was the ground on which I my dreams grew. Yet I know that for some who had the same vigour n dreams for comperes, some of it died down...because of the politics? because of some other memebr's lack of committement?
Are my views soo different from every other sane person's? Am I a typical blood type B person? hahaha puts emotions 1st, overconfident int heir work....doesnt like interference? etc etc etc?
Or is it coz Im superficial..that I love to go up stage and show myself? Only to have a possible group of pple criticizing me and my skills or looks...
Ive lost my drive..for teh past few weeks...like...not toos ure what I wanna do... it totally sucks coz..its making me listless... At this point of time..I need to take a break and think abt or do somethign abt my life...
Till then..I might be writing lesser...
love
Tuesday, October 11, 2005
Awwww!
Saw this kid (its a girl) at one of my storytelling sessions before an SSO Performance. She is soooo cute!! Never seen such LLOOONNNGGGGG lashes before!!!
Her dad is indian while her mum is chinese :) What can i say hahaha mix racial babies are the most beautiful hahaha
Bumped into her dad and her while the concert was on and the dad was trying to coax her into saying thank you hahaha "say thank you baby, say thank you" Its the way he said it that showed how much he loved her hahahah
heres her pic...
Her dad is indian while her mum is chinese :) What can i say hahaha mix racial babies are the most beautiful hahaha
Bumped into her dad and her while the concert was on and the dad was trying to coax her into saying thank you hahaha "say thank you baby, say thank you" Its the way he said it that showed how much he loved her hahahah
heres her pic...
Have a clearer pic of her but I dont think the parents would like that hahah so Ive resorted to this. :) She's the one on the bottom left. She's only 19months old..little Arika.
You know Ive been thinking...Im quite game to adopt an indian or Sri lankan or thai child (whichever is available) when I am able to. I know you must be wondering why I choose kids that are not of my own race...well...I wanna make a point. I never want my family to keep having ideas that indians are bad etc or even malays. Maybe the kid will grow up to be someone who knows both sides of the coin...chinese and indian...or heck! Cantonese! Besides...when you want to help a kid, does race really matter? Does it mean that you wont help a child coz he/she is of another race?
I dont know..its one of my crazy ideas. hahaha
Monday, October 10, 2005
Oh how I miss thee!!!
:P
Oh How I miss thee
you beautiful shade of blue
You big with no sleeves
you holely and grand
with the number 23
silver edged on your behind
ohhh how I miss thee
Thee MJ Wizards Jersey
Let me venture back into JB
and bring thee back with me
To treasure and hold
and wear thee if thou would allowest me to wear thee
Oh I miss thee!
Thee MJ Jersey in JB
This is how crazy I am now. Just had a meeting and realize how much work I need to do...just thinking abt it can be very daunting. :/ I can truly say that I ma entirely impressed w my boss. :) Impressed and in awe...
Work is okay and the week will hopefully get better. Just need to night to think through all my work. :)
Love
Oh How I miss thee
you beautiful shade of blue
You big with no sleeves
you holely and grand
with the number 23
silver edged on your behind
ohhh how I miss thee
Thee MJ Wizards Jersey
Let me venture back into JB
and bring thee back with me
To treasure and hold
and wear thee if thou would allowest me to wear thee
Oh I miss thee!
Thee MJ Jersey in JB
This is how crazy I am now. Just had a meeting and realize how much work I need to do...just thinking abt it can be very daunting. :/ I can truly say that I ma entirely impressed w my boss. :) Impressed and in awe...
Work is okay and the week will hopefully get better. Just need to night to think through all my work. :)
Love
Sunday, October 09, 2005
JB!!!
to my bro: WoooSaaaa!...OOaaaammmmm
Went to JB on sat and it was great fun man!
Was damn excited through the whole week just coz of that trip and it proves to be as fun as I thought. Had a brudda to bring me and his frens around JB area. Bought a bag n some food for my sister's birthday :P
I may sound damn silly being all excited over going across the causeway..like never go before liek that hahahah but truth is...Ive never gone to JB when Iw as old enough to see everything aroudn me! This trip, gave me an insight on malaysia life. At least the one in JB. Heres a few snippets of JB life that I rememebr most...
1) As we walked through teh overhead bridge after customs, I saw this begger with a legt hat looked like it was chewed on..it was also septic...I cudnt help but drop my jaw and utter loudly, "shit!" Its really sad....
2) We walked along the supposed red light district in that are (dun worry it was int eh day and no ehmm business was open) Saw this motorcycle with 2 dogs sitting on it like they were going on a ride hahaha comical really hahahahaha
3) There are loads of motorcyclists!!!
4) Loads fo nice stuff to buy but not neccessarily cheaper
5) Secret Recipe Cakes are loads cheaper and the manager of the branch we weer at was excellent. Im honestly impressed y him man! Hats Off! (will explain soon)
6) SAW A MICHAEL JORDAN JERSEY SELLING AT 100 Ruppeesss!!!!!!!!...emm I mean Ringgit hahahaha Waahhhhh! Pity didnt get it!! :(
* Hey Peeps! My birthday coming soon!!! Hahahahaha HINT HINT HINT!!!!
There you have it! My observations hahaha I'll have loads more the next time I go hahaha
As for my Secret Recipe Story, here it is...
One of the girls who went with us, bought one whole cake and left it there until we were ready to go home. When we came back to collectt he cake, they said they had sold it. The counter girl was starting to get cold sweat man! hahaha We gave a fwe options like collecting our cake in Spore...etc but the Manager had a better idea. He told us to wait a few mins (which turned out to be 20mins +) and called up other branches to see if tey had extra. If they had, he'd give us their last cake that she wanted while he got his guy to fetch a replacemtn cake from the other branch.
In my opinion, the manager was fast-thinking and Im terribly impressed :) Our fren got her cake and we happily went home. :)
Aside fromt he JB trip, I also wanna say HURRAY to the racist bloggers being jailed!! Both 25 yrs old and above, chinese...disgraced the chinese race by spewing insults and insults on Malays and their religions n race....Its disgusting tot he core and Im mighty glad their jailed!
I actually laughed aloud when I read the papers and saw them hahah the 27 year old ddoesnt even look 27! he looks like a JC student or poly student! How sad is that! hahahaha
The end of the article says that this is a warning to those who do the same, to stop it.
K shall end here. Dead tired!
LOVE
Went to JB on sat and it was great fun man!
Was damn excited through the whole week just coz of that trip and it proves to be as fun as I thought. Had a brudda to bring me and his frens around JB area. Bought a bag n some food for my sister's birthday :P
I may sound damn silly being all excited over going across the causeway..like never go before liek that hahahah but truth is...Ive never gone to JB when Iw as old enough to see everything aroudn me! This trip, gave me an insight on malaysia life. At least the one in JB. Heres a few snippets of JB life that I rememebr most...
1) As we walked through teh overhead bridge after customs, I saw this begger with a legt hat looked like it was chewed on..it was also septic...I cudnt help but drop my jaw and utter loudly, "shit!" Its really sad....
2) We walked along the supposed red light district in that are (dun worry it was int eh day and no ehmm business was open) Saw this motorcycle with 2 dogs sitting on it like they were going on a ride hahaha comical really hahahahaha
3) There are loads of motorcyclists!!!
4) Loads fo nice stuff to buy but not neccessarily cheaper
5) Secret Recipe Cakes are loads cheaper and the manager of the branch we weer at was excellent. Im honestly impressed y him man! Hats Off! (will explain soon)
6) SAW A MICHAEL JORDAN JERSEY SELLING AT 100 Ruppeesss!!!!!!!!...emm I mean Ringgit hahahaha Waahhhhh! Pity didnt get it!! :(
* Hey Peeps! My birthday coming soon!!! Hahahahaha HINT HINT HINT!!!!
There you have it! My observations hahaha I'll have loads more the next time I go hahaha
As for my Secret Recipe Story, here it is...
One of the girls who went with us, bought one whole cake and left it there until we were ready to go home. When we came back to collectt he cake, they said they had sold it. The counter girl was starting to get cold sweat man! hahaha We gave a fwe options like collecting our cake in Spore...etc but the Manager had a better idea. He told us to wait a few mins (which turned out to be 20mins +) and called up other branches to see if tey had extra. If they had, he'd give us their last cake that she wanted while he got his guy to fetch a replacemtn cake from the other branch.
In my opinion, the manager was fast-thinking and Im terribly impressed :) Our fren got her cake and we happily went home. :)
Aside fromt he JB trip, I also wanna say HURRAY to the racist bloggers being jailed!! Both 25 yrs old and above, chinese...disgraced the chinese race by spewing insults and insults on Malays and their religions n race....Its disgusting tot he core and Im mighty glad their jailed!
I actually laughed aloud when I read the papers and saw them hahah the 27 year old ddoesnt even look 27! he looks like a JC student or poly student! How sad is that! hahahaha
The end of the article says that this is a warning to those who do the same, to stop it.
K shall end here. Dead tired!
LOVE
Saturday, October 08, 2005
Im at a loss
Suddenly I feel as if I dont know my frens at all...I only know the one they show me...not what they do behind my back. Not that they all wanna stab me int he back....but that whenever I hear something abt them that they've been hidding from me, I get dissappointed..esp whe nits something...bad...
Have I been soooo critical of my frens that there isnt total honesty? or maybe I ask too much.
Its really very dissappointing....
Know Im stuck with 2 of my frens who are telling me diff things abt each other. Things I can only be shocked or surprised abt...yet in my mind...I dont know who to believe...both of them dont seem like that kind of person...yet I can only justify 50% of their chracters...the ones they show me... Maybe they arent even truthful to me...maybe all this while the fren I though I knew...has always been playing me like a fool... I cant believe this is all happening but..it could happen! Boht of these frens Ive regarded highly...both of these frens are valuable..both of these frens are my frens frens and...its like Im stepping on a time bomb or a landmine...just to get to the otherside....the truth...
Wats more amazing..is that...Ive never had this prob w my sec sch frens! (least so far)...Ive lived my tears n happiness w them and they've never once done anything like this... Or is it coz Ive been kept int he dark for soo long....coz nobody wants me to find out...
Is it coz they dont want me to get worked up? They dont want me to get upset n get angry w them? To disown them as frens? or is it coz they feel I have no need of knowing at all...that it realy is none of my business and that if I do know..it wudnt matter aything to them. Or maybe it was all intentional.
You must think im psychotic...Im dillusional or plain making a mountain out of a molehill...maybe...maybe... but wudnt some of you say that it does happen?
JUst wondering....Do we get smarter as we grow older...or more stupid?...
love
Have I been soooo critical of my frens that there isnt total honesty? or maybe I ask too much.
Its really very dissappointing....
Know Im stuck with 2 of my frens who are telling me diff things abt each other. Things I can only be shocked or surprised abt...yet in my mind...I dont know who to believe...both of them dont seem like that kind of person...yet I can only justify 50% of their chracters...the ones they show me... Maybe they arent even truthful to me...maybe all this while the fren I though I knew...has always been playing me like a fool... I cant believe this is all happening but..it could happen! Boht of these frens Ive regarded highly...both of these frens are valuable..both of these frens are my frens frens and...its like Im stepping on a time bomb or a landmine...just to get to the otherside....the truth...
Wats more amazing..is that...Ive never had this prob w my sec sch frens! (least so far)...Ive lived my tears n happiness w them and they've never once done anything like this... Or is it coz Ive been kept int he dark for soo long....coz nobody wants me to find out...
Is it coz they dont want me to get worked up? They dont want me to get upset n get angry w them? To disown them as frens? or is it coz they feel I have no need of knowing at all...that it realy is none of my business and that if I do know..it wudnt matter aything to them. Or maybe it was all intentional.
You must think im psychotic...Im dillusional or plain making a mountain out of a molehill...maybe...maybe... but wudnt some of you say that it does happen?
JUst wondering....Do we get smarter as we grow older...or more stupid?...
love
Thursday, October 06, 2005
Wohooo! Thank you God!
You know...just when you thinkt he whole day is gonna be a sad day...somethign comes..God gives you something that makes you know he's there to help you.
Was clearing my stuff today and found some stuff that Id need for my NYAA writeing. For the past few days Ive had that prob int eh back of my head nd I know its extremely tough for me to ask my frens for the past events we did etc..Thanks to God, Ive got all the details for some of my catergories :P
Thank you God!!! :)
LOVE
Was clearing my stuff today and found some stuff that Id need for my NYAA writeing. For the past few days Ive had that prob int eh back of my head nd I know its extremely tough for me to ask my frens for the past events we did etc..Thanks to God, Ive got all the details for some of my catergories :P
Thank you God!!! :)
LOVE
...
I dont know how many tiems ive done this...thinking that my ex is dead...but here I go doing this again.
Over the past 2 years..he's changed alot..Ive heard alot of stuff that i cant believe my ex wud have done if we were still together...beause of this..it breaks my heart. simply coz I still have feelings for him and its probabaly not ever gonna go away...no matter how I deceive myself into saying that Im over it. I can not bear to see someone tarnish the name Pravin Raj Aryen...coz..I thought that was a beautiful name to have. Yet from all i hear now...Pravin Raj Aryen is the name of a ___________ (you fill int he blanks) .... It really breaks my heart... Why cant it belong to some other indian name?...NVM
Thus..once again (after a efw failed attempts) I deny the fact that my ex is an idiot to say that that person whom I loved..is died. His good name will live on in my heart...unfortunately only in my heart....I guess. I'll rememebr the Pravin who loved me and cried for me and everythingelse as another guy...someone who's passed on and now plays chess and drinks teh bing with God. I'll love him as much someone whom I cud talk about anything to...At least i can still see him as my best fren. The dead one I mean hahaha
As for the Pravin we all know now...he's someone whom ive no interest in being close frens with because of his ways...he's like any regular sex loving guy. Sorry bros...I know not everyone is ike that. u guys arent...I hope...Or have I been sooo blinded? Maybe I expect too much brains from my guy frens to think for themselves and not get into trouble...
Anyway...dont know how to explain my dissappointment..but to say that I feel like someone took the ground off from under my feet...I look up and I see my best fren grinning w the pulled out piece of flooring in his hands. Well if I think like that, its deceiving myself..but at least I can still believe that my best fren was a good fren.
LOVE
Over the past 2 years..he's changed alot..Ive heard alot of stuff that i cant believe my ex wud have done if we were still together...beause of this..it breaks my heart. simply coz I still have feelings for him and its probabaly not ever gonna go away...no matter how I deceive myself into saying that Im over it. I can not bear to see someone tarnish the name Pravin Raj Aryen...coz..I thought that was a beautiful name to have. Yet from all i hear now...Pravin Raj Aryen is the name of a ___________ (you fill int he blanks) .... It really breaks my heart... Why cant it belong to some other indian name?...NVM
Thus..once again (after a efw failed attempts) I deny the fact that my ex is an idiot to say that that person whom I loved..is died. His good name will live on in my heart...unfortunately only in my heart....I guess. I'll rememebr the Pravin who loved me and cried for me and everythingelse as another guy...someone who's passed on and now plays chess and drinks teh bing with God. I'll love him as much someone whom I cud talk about anything to...At least i can still see him as my best fren. The dead one I mean hahaha
As for the Pravin we all know now...he's someone whom ive no interest in being close frens with because of his ways...he's like any regular sex loving guy. Sorry bros...I know not everyone is ike that. u guys arent...I hope...Or have I been sooo blinded? Maybe I expect too much brains from my guy frens to think for themselves and not get into trouble...
Anyway...dont know how to explain my dissappointment..but to say that I feel like someone took the ground off from under my feet...I look up and I see my best fren grinning w the pulled out piece of flooring in his hands. Well if I think like that, its deceiving myself..but at least I can still believe that my best fren was a good fren.
LOVE
Wednesday, October 05, 2005
Little silly things I do...
Lets start fromt he beginning....hmmm
K heres a shout out to my compere n sparc mates! I need help w the dates for our NYAA stuff...:P PLEASE HELP ME!!! PLLLEEEAAASSSEEEE. I know its bloody late but it wud mean alot to me!
Had a company health check-up. since its free and for everyone (which is why I cud do it) I did!
Had to fill in a form abt medical history n stuff...
Eg: Have any of your family memebers had the following diseases?
Options: Heart disease, Diabetes, Stroke, Cancer, etc....Hmm looking at my medical lineage..from my grandpas n grandmas...instead of asking what I have...they might as well ask what I dont have!!! I have..(counting) all of the above! Drat!
The results of everything...blood test, urine test, blood pressure..etc...results were good..except...(and this breaks my heart)..my body fat percentage... :( Waaahhhhh
So conclusion... exercise more regularly and watch what you eat (must be one of those standard lines the nurse says to everyone) Yet..it means alot more for me hahahahha
Soooo.....NO MORE INDIAN FOOD!!! MORE VEGS!!! MORE FRUITS!!!LESS FAST FOOD!!!
(nods head with resolution)
Id like to seek everyones co-operation to scold me or reprimand me abt this simple resolution hehehe. It has given me more determination to exercise...thus..more running in basketball...n more running in the gym... Aye Edwin n Josh! You know what to do ah! Hahahaha Im glad I ahve Aikido as well :P
Speaking of Aikido...my butt hurts :(......
LOVE
K heres a shout out to my compere n sparc mates! I need help w the dates for our NYAA stuff...:P PLEASE HELP ME!!! PLLLEEEAAASSSEEEE. I know its bloody late but it wud mean alot to me!
Had a company health check-up. since its free and for everyone (which is why I cud do it) I did!
Had to fill in a form abt medical history n stuff...
Eg: Have any of your family memebers had the following diseases?
Options: Heart disease, Diabetes, Stroke, Cancer, etc....Hmm looking at my medical lineage..from my grandpas n grandmas...instead of asking what I have...they might as well ask what I dont have!!! I have..(counting) all of the above! Drat!
The results of everything...blood test, urine test, blood pressure..etc...results were good..except...(and this breaks my heart)..my body fat percentage... :( Waaahhhhh
So conclusion... exercise more regularly and watch what you eat (must be one of those standard lines the nurse says to everyone) Yet..it means alot more for me hahahahha
Soooo.....NO MORE INDIAN FOOD!!! MORE VEGS!!! MORE FRUITS!!!LESS FAST FOOD!!!
(nods head with resolution)
Id like to seek everyones co-operation to scold me or reprimand me abt this simple resolution hehehe. It has given me more determination to exercise...thus..more running in basketball...n more running in the gym... Aye Edwin n Josh! You know what to do ah! Hahahaha Im glad I ahve Aikido as well :P
Speaking of Aikido...my butt hurts :(......
LOVE
Sunday, October 02, 2005
nothing much...
once a compere..always a compere...
Im determined to go to the compere camp n wake those new n old compere members up...
I dont think there will ever be anothe batch of comperes like my batch...we jelled with the sparcs like we were siblings...
Much as Iw ant the new batch to be like that...theres no sure fire way or formula tog et that..sigh..I love comperes...just wish I cud go back to teh past n relive everything i had then.
LOVE
Im determined to go to the compere camp n wake those new n old compere members up...
I dont think there will ever be anothe batch of comperes like my batch...we jelled with the sparcs like we were siblings...
Much as Iw ant the new batch to be like that...theres no sure fire way or formula tog et that..sigh..I love comperes...just wish I cud go back to teh past n relive everything i had then.
LOVE
Saturday, October 01, 2005
...Im such a bad person...
K i know u think Im going into one of my self-reproaching modes...
Today I was made to ask my dad abt his recent scan...something I wudnt have really wanted to do on my own free will...I did and he said he didnt have money for a scan so he took an autosound instead...He said..and I quote,"I dont have money for an scan...., you spent all ur money on vcds!" he didnt say it with a very blaming tone..but somehow it hit me.
He's right...I do spend money on myself..my vcds..my dvds..my books..my transport..my lunch..etc...Inside..the more i think of it..the moer I feel that Im to blame...for not providing for the only dad i have..whom much as I dont like or really love....He is still my dad...
So theres an invisible yet formidable force weighing down on me..to find a proper job n provide for the family..like my sis...stable n sensible..knows what she wants in life...
The prob with all this is...Im not ready to stick to one job now...Im not ready to jump into a perm job that lasts 10 years..I want to stick my head around n find out or do thigns Ive always wanted to do..like work w autistic pple, do tuition, childcare, sing, write songs....comm service. But everytime I want to do this...I face the same wall..the same wall that forces many pple to give up their dreams...and follow the route to a "normal "life....
Do I get a proper job, focus on it, give up other interesting but less profitable stints and work till I grow old?
When my sis wanted to change a job, she had to go into my dad's room aka the board room, and face his questions n reproaches n his disapproving face and a casual.."okay whatever you want!" Sorta makes me wonder who's life it is.. maybe thats why my sis is like that..happy to live her own world...and thus maybe thats why she made me ask my dad abt his scan instead (if thats the case, makes me pissed)...
Everybody int he house is "supposed" to tell him everything..reports...only my sis cud get out of that..or most of it.
My mum is thinking of going for a holiday w my auntie..she's worried that my dad wud be angry...because he told my auntie not to go coz of my grandma being alone int eh house...Here's wat I think (tell me if Im being too selfish) If I were in my auntie's shoes, Id still go if I wanted to...coz his remarks imply that Im the only one who can take care of my grandma..or who shud take care of my grnadma..which is wrong. Coz my grandma is a shared responsibilty as children...Just coz my grandma lives in my auntie's place, doesnt make it only my auntie's responsibility. As for my mum, my mum has the right to have a holiday whether for her contributions as a wife or mum or colleague...My dad shudnt have the right or reason to be angry w her. Watever the case..if the both of them leave for new zealand...my sis n I will be going over to my auntie's place to stay w grandma.
A I selfish? to think that I, my auntie n my mum have the right to do our own stuff...even when we have obligations to fulfill? Isnt there a break?
Just thinking of not being able to do the things Ive always wanted to do...sorta makes life abit sad...Is that allt here is to life? Or am I just to weak to fight for it..being driven back into my den or made to flee the frontline by the immense guilt of responsibility...
Isnt that a famous excuse? Even for me....."I have to do this", "My dad will blow his top", "My dad will flip".....sigh
I think this is the reason why Im afraid to open the door opportunity even when i was standing in front of it...because i feared that if I go through it n it opens..it might close shut on me..I wud haev to walk staright n face the same comments n scoldings by my parents..for not finding a proper job, for being used...like whatt hey are doing now...
Life sux...
Today I was made to ask my dad abt his recent scan...something I wudnt have really wanted to do on my own free will...I did and he said he didnt have money for a scan so he took an autosound instead...He said..and I quote,"I dont have money for an scan...., you spent all ur money on vcds!" he didnt say it with a very blaming tone..but somehow it hit me.
He's right...I do spend money on myself..my vcds..my dvds..my books..my transport..my lunch..etc...Inside..the more i think of it..the moer I feel that Im to blame...for not providing for the only dad i have..whom much as I dont like or really love....He is still my dad...
So theres an invisible yet formidable force weighing down on me..to find a proper job n provide for the family..like my sis...stable n sensible..knows what she wants in life...
The prob with all this is...Im not ready to stick to one job now...Im not ready to jump into a perm job that lasts 10 years..I want to stick my head around n find out or do thigns Ive always wanted to do..like work w autistic pple, do tuition, childcare, sing, write songs....comm service. But everytime I want to do this...I face the same wall..the same wall that forces many pple to give up their dreams...and follow the route to a "normal "life....
Do I get a proper job, focus on it, give up other interesting but less profitable stints and work till I grow old?
When my sis wanted to change a job, she had to go into my dad's room aka the board room, and face his questions n reproaches n his disapproving face and a casual.."okay whatever you want!" Sorta makes me wonder who's life it is.. maybe thats why my sis is like that..happy to live her own world...and thus maybe thats why she made me ask my dad abt his scan instead (if thats the case, makes me pissed)...
Everybody int he house is "supposed" to tell him everything..reports...only my sis cud get out of that..or most of it.
My mum is thinking of going for a holiday w my auntie..she's worried that my dad wud be angry...because he told my auntie not to go coz of my grandma being alone int eh house...Here's wat I think (tell me if Im being too selfish) If I were in my auntie's shoes, Id still go if I wanted to...coz his remarks imply that Im the only one who can take care of my grandma..or who shud take care of my grnadma..which is wrong. Coz my grandma is a shared responsibilty as children...Just coz my grandma lives in my auntie's place, doesnt make it only my auntie's responsibility. As for my mum, my mum has the right to have a holiday whether for her contributions as a wife or mum or colleague...My dad shudnt have the right or reason to be angry w her. Watever the case..if the both of them leave for new zealand...my sis n I will be going over to my auntie's place to stay w grandma.
A I selfish? to think that I, my auntie n my mum have the right to do our own stuff...even when we have obligations to fulfill? Isnt there a break?
Just thinking of not being able to do the things Ive always wanted to do...sorta makes life abit sad...Is that allt here is to life? Or am I just to weak to fight for it..being driven back into my den or made to flee the frontline by the immense guilt of responsibility...
Isnt that a famous excuse? Even for me....."I have to do this", "My dad will blow his top", "My dad will flip".....sigh
I think this is the reason why Im afraid to open the door opportunity even when i was standing in front of it...because i feared that if I go through it n it opens..it might close shut on me..I wud haev to walk staright n face the same comments n scoldings by my parents..for not finding a proper job, for being used...like whatt hey are doing now...
Life sux...
...zzzzz
Tired...
went tot he gym today...just to try things out for size....verdict? Not comfortable w it... Conclusion? Not gonna go gym hehehe unless I wanna do running...
I guess those who do use the gym for workouts..are fitter and carry more weights than I do..thus..they start off with 2K or 5K. I'll break my bones if I do :P So Im settling for the comfort of my own home. :) With my own weights.
Went to makan breakfast w my neighbour n we had an impromptu idea to watch Corpse Bride...Honestly. storyline is abit ...weak....but I like the effects. The stories like a mix of Nightmare before Christmas and Edward scissorhands. Sorta sad that the storyended thatw ay hahahah but I wont give away the ending! No fun anymore! :P Go se it for urself!
Quite tired now...after soo much I still feel like I did nothing man!
LOVE
went tot he gym today...just to try things out for size....verdict? Not comfortable w it... Conclusion? Not gonna go gym hehehe unless I wanna do running...
I guess those who do use the gym for workouts..are fitter and carry more weights than I do..thus..they start off with 2K or 5K. I'll break my bones if I do :P So Im settling for the comfort of my own home. :) With my own weights.
Went to makan breakfast w my neighbour n we had an impromptu idea to watch Corpse Bride...Honestly. storyline is abit ...weak....but I like the effects. The stories like a mix of Nightmare before Christmas and Edward scissorhands. Sorta sad that the storyended thatw ay hahahah but I wont give away the ending! No fun anymore! :P Go se it for urself!
Quite tired now...after soo much I still feel like I did nothing man!
LOVE
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