nothing to say...

Once again, I have nothing specific to say...just feel like writing.

At my aunt's place now...will be going back to my own home today...few things I plan to do is to clear my room....use photoshop, write songs..etc...

Fort he past week or so, Ive had soo many inspirations to write...feel like I wanna pen things down but ive never done it... :/ I think ive become abit afraid to pick up the pen...coz I feel as if....notihng that comes out of me is good....not now at least. My songs all seemt he same.

Been thinking of my ex abit these days...its quite weird really....but somethings never fail to remind me of him and so it does. No more tears k. Dont worry.Just sorta missing.
What breaks my heart most...is thatwe used to be best buddies. I used t want to tell him everything man...now..the things I can bring myself to tell, I cant. The things I can tell, I cant bring myself to tell. Our friendships has been laid dormant and almost extinct...for the pure reason that....I cant bring myself to face him and act like how we were when we were pals. Not now....Co it wud hurt too much. I dont know how jenny does it and I dont know how he does it but I cant. Coz I value everything too much. Maybe next time...Im just hoping that by then, our friendship wdnt be eroded byt ime to non-existence. Watever it is....if he sees this, I can only say, Im sorry for being this way...but please believe me that I realllyyyy realllyyyy do treasure our friendhip. I really do! I wish cud just go back 3 years ago and act like we were inseperable buddies...but I cant....I cant do that now. You can sayt hat it doesnt have to be this way. True..it doesnt....not for you.Coz you have the strength and past experieinces to carry yourself over theemotional barrier. For me, I have to fight through the motional barrier. Till I get to the other side, there is notihng I can do but to leave temporarily out of my life. I didnt forget the fun we had as buddies...but now, neither can I forget the memories we had as a couple....till I get past that emotional barrier. Take care bro...Sweetest sweet sister.

So thats abit or reminiscing for you....its a pity really.....I loved teh frenship we had....like how another bro of mine and I are now....1st on the buddy list hahahaha yeah. Im glad to have soo many buddies, so many sista n bruddas who are there for me and I only wish I cud be there for them even more. Feeling quite guilty sigh...I know it sounds crazy yah but i wonder how many pple wud attend my funeral hahahaha :P (k bad joke)

To my sistas n bruddas, I dont know why u guys wud think that im a sincere n caringperson yah...Coz I dont think I am one.Im sorry if ive neglected you or not spoken to you for soo long. I guess Im still in the process of finding my direction in life so ive lost sight of those around me.
Plus...my schedule is soo tight now that I cant meet you guys often. Sorry for that as well... if only I cud gather all of you together into one room and stretch my arms as far as I cant hug all of you att he same time hahahahaha

Watever it is....I LOVEYOU GUYS!!! :) hahaha the irony abt the pain of having a broken relationship, is it helps you to realize that everybodyelse around you also loves you as much. :)

LOVE